water water ever where and all the boards did shrink

2010-01-03T02:17:00.000-08:00

this is my third attempt to start a blog post. i have no idea what the fuck i should write. umm its 2010 now and whats happend to me over a year

- i have traveled with a friend

- two people who i saw as good friends are no longer my friends.

- i smoked pot

- i lost my faith compleatly in christianity.

- i feel in love (its true although im hesatent to say it cause there is always the doubt that young people really know what love is)

- i got drunk and climbed a roof

- i bunjee jumped

- i got grounded for helping a friend ( it was worth it)

- i kissed in the rain ( was on my list of things to do before i die so yes this is important :P)

- i cry'ed in a friends arms

- i had a friend cry in my arms

- i made new friends

- i felt like i have made new enemies

- i pissed people off

- i made people laugh

- i danced

- i loved

- i laughed

- i hated

- i ranted

- i cry'ed

- i raged

- i smiled

- i drank irn bru

- I LIVED

weird dream

2009-12-24T08:56:00.000-08:00

today is christmas eve and i had a very odd dream last night. so a bunch of people and i were in vancouver. it was all the orginal sc crew. before stupid things started being said and friends started disowning each other. anyway it was christmas eve in my dream and all of us were on the bus trying to get home for christmas. but well catching the last cty bus to the ferry. i saw this one very dirty and extreamly young skinny lady put a five year old girl on the bus. she bent down to the girl and said "stay on this bus till you get to the final stop, then get on the ferry. your dad will pick you up on the other side". then the mother (who looked like a hooker in all honesy in my dream) got off the bus.

my friend karebear was sitting beside me on the bus and made some comment about not likeing kids and being dissapointed that we had to sit beside one during the whole bus ride to the ferry. i on the other hand was wondering what kind of mother would just ditch her child on the bus heading to the ferry well going downtown vancouver. (like i said this was an odd dream). during the bus ride in my dream i sat beside this child during most of the ride. and played with her, and amused her. then we got to the ferry. but well still on the bus. i realized that the girl did not have her shoes on. and all my friends had run off the bus without in a rush to get tickets for the most recent ferry. i quickly helped the girl put on her shoes and grab her backpack. then asked her were her jacket was, considering it is winter and she would be cold and all. The girl said that she did not have a jacket. i mumbled something under my breath about bad parenting i do not remember what it was.

i then told the girl that we would have to get off the bus and walk iver and buy some tickets to get on the ferry. when we finaly got to the booth. i asked the girl where the money was that her mom gave her to get on the ferry?. she surched her pockets and backpack and said that her mom must have not given her money cause there was none there. so i pulled out my visa and paid for both of us. thinking im not going to ditch a child at the ferry terminal cause either A) she lost her money or B) mostlikley her mom did not give her money in the first place.

i was also thinking in my dream well this was happening that there was a chance that sence she is meeting her father on the other side he could maybe pay me back for the ferry ticket. the next thing i know in my dream i hear someone yell "stop police". then i get arrested in my dream cause apperently the girl on the bus was kidnapped and was missing. and the police in my dream think that i kidnapped her.

then after being cuffed i wake up from this dream..

it was weird. what the hell was that dream saying?

update

2009-12-16T18:20:00.000-08:00

yay winter break i am done my exams!!! i desperatly need a break. the sad thing is yes i am very exsited about christmas but thats not what im most exsited about. what im most exsited about is the fact that i get to sleep in more now. no more waking up at 6:50am to bus into victoria till january 6th.

its funny. their are about 8 presents under the three right now, and all of them are from me. i think its because im the person who likes to put the presents that i buy under the tree right away it makes the room look more christmasy, well my parents like to wait till it is even closer till christmas to put them under the tree.

today was also my last day at this practicum, i felt sad leaving. all the children in the practicum ended up singing me a good bye song. im going to miss them. also the my sponser educators gave me a christmas card and huged me good bye. they said if when i graduate i ever need refurances to get a job i am more then welcome to use their name, and that i am also more then welcome to come and visit them anytime as long as i am not to busy with school and my other practicum.

i also found out that when i graduate with ecce here it transfurs perfectly to be an ecce in england. so if i wanted i could go and work in england for a year. i think this would be really cool. The way that this degree works is after two years and graduating you get your licence to practice. then you have a year to get a cirten number of hours done, you need to get these hours done to keep your licence and also to get the licence to run your own preschool. i was thinking you know instead of staying here i could go and get thoes hours in another country that would be cool. i was orginally thinking when i graduate i would go volunteer in an orphanage in another country but i dont think that counts for the actual hours i will need to get unfrotinitly. so i have to work for a year. and if i do that i might as well go work in another country. i am thinking of seeing if it is the same in scotland. because the uk is pretty the same from what i know. it would be realy cool to go and get an appartment and work in scotland for a year as a preschool teacher and then come back if that was possible.

also addy, if i did that then i would be in the uk around the same time you would because we graduate the same year, you would be in the navy and i would be teaching little children. funny. although you will be able to stay and i would be going back home in a year.

so this is what im thinking, it would be cool.

this is all thats new with me. im glad i get a break

agg, preschool stories

2009-12-09T20:48:00.000-08:00

a story from a preschool. due to confidentiality i cannot say actual names or the place but i can do enitails.

so there is this boy ill call him x. and another boy in the preschool ill call him y. so x is new to the preschoo. he is a nice boy, a little quiet but his one challange is that he does not know how to express himself when people are buging him or getting in his way so he will push or hit them. We are working on getting him to use his words and he is honestly getting better there are less hittings and shoving happening in the preschool and more space sharing and all around friendly ness.

then there is boy y. boy y is an only child, clearly spoiled. and if i was not supposed to be more professional when working with children i would call him a brat. he has thrown his food around, spat gum on the floor (i dont know why his parents gave him gum) and likes to have lots of attention. he actually pulled his penis out of his pants the other day and ran up to children yelling look at me, which ill admit was a little bit funny but still.

anyway. so y and x are playing today and i am watching them but then this little girl got pant all over her hands and i had to help her go to the bathroom and wash her hands. when im done helping her and we come out of the bathroom y comes running up to me saying that x has hit him. so i go up to x and i talk with him i explain how we are not going to hit our friends because preschoo is a safe place. x says he did not hit y. i dont know what to say at this point becasue i did not actually see anyone hit the other person, but x is a hitter and a pusher. so i have a talk about making a friend feel better, and how we dont hurt our friends. x apologises and y smiles and walks off.

then later in the day i see y running through the class room with siccors waving them around well he runs. i see him doing it and i take his hands crouch down to his eye level and explain how its not safe to run with siccors. y looks and me and yells "x did it". it is at this point after i talk with my sponser educator that i learn that y has been tatleing on x all day for things that x has not doen, but its a way for y to get attention. becasue he has picked up on the fact that x has been hitting people and y can blame him for things.

i feel bad for most of the practicum after that. cause i remeber what it is like to be a kid who gets accused for something i did not do, and how much it sucked when the teacher did not belive. and then i just did that exsact thing. but i also understand how it is hard to see everything. but still, x apologized when he did not have to becasue y was pointing fingers and i belived y.

dang.

2009-12-07T20:21:00.000-08:00

its time for a less depressing blog. so update. that class where i got a bad mark i got a test back from it and got 100% on the test im going to say that, that is fucking awesome. christmas is getting closer and i am still a little kid and am getting exsited. as for shopping i have so far bought some friends presents, my dad a present but im getting him another, my mom a present but im spliting that one with mark and i want one to be just from me so im getting another, and one for mark and if i can find something else that looks interesting to him then i will buy him a second present also. oh oh and today i got a ginger bread house and i am totaly setting it up on wednesday that should be fun.

and i convinced my mom that we need to go and get a christmas tree this weekend so we will be doing that, and i really wanna put more decorations up to make that house more awesome.
im also hopeing that i will be the one who gets to set up the manger this year, cause my dad sets it up wrong when he does it. he puts the animals outside the manger and the people in, when the people are clearly supposed to be outside and the animals in. i mean common a women shows up to a barn to give birth they are not going to kick all the animals out in time before she goes into agonizing labour. her screams might scare them out, but i am sure animals have heard weirder things in their life time.

so hopefully more chrstmas things will be set up, winter break starts soon this is my last week of school for this semester it makes me ever so happy, i mean i am enjoying my classes but i really could use a break. im also going to tell my boss that i dont want extra hours because like i said i need a break, i hate going strait from fulltime school onto full time work it makes me so tired and stressed. i actually stated developing an eye twitch in the summer i was getting so tired and stressed from always working especially right after school. i think i hid it pretty well and it disapeared right after i went to san fransico on vaction. started to come back in the begining of the school year and shows up every once and a while but not that much and i hope that it stays that way.
that is why i need a break, and christmas with good friedns and awesome family is the perfect way for me to get a break.

merry christmas everyone

i hate the school system

2009-11-28T11:21:00.000-08:00

i have come to the conclusion that the school system is shit.

why is it that when i try really hard with a paper, i get it back and i get an F. but then when i compleatly and uterly bullshit a paper without actually doing the work. not to mention typing it up the night before when i get that paper back i get 86% on it.

does this seem wrong here to anyone else?

work= f

bull shit= A

hmm no no wonder todays youth is not really learning anything in this education system. well strike that we are learning something. but its not the material that we are supposed to be learning. what we are learning is how bullshit our way into getting good grades. how to say something that sounds an A rather then doing something that deserves an A. saying what the teachers whant to hear and getting a good grade, or putting in the effort and getting a bad grade.

the system is fucked. if i have learned anything this week it is that hard work does not seem to pay off in the education system. even though it should. what pays of is manipulation and knowing what to say and when to say it.

because in the end of the day. it appears that the only way to get good grades is to bullshit you way throught it.

fuck my school life

2009-11-26T17:05:00.000-08:00

my face is streaked with tears and i feel like im going to throw up. no its not because im sick. its not even because i lost someone close to me. i just having a really bad fucking day. i feel like the shit is hitting the fan majourly. so this is how my day goes i wake up after a good nights sleep everything feels good. i pack my bag head downstairs and grab some food and go to turn on my computer. and guess what it is fucked up. the screen is all pixalaited and i cant do anything,. i officially hate pc laptops and am going to spend my money on a mac even if that causes me to be out 2 thousand dollers at least that way ill have a fucking computer that knows how to fucking work. then i get up to the bus stop. well waiting there i realize shit i forgot my text book. with no time to run back to my house and grab it i figure i can do without it for a day. then when i get to school today i look in my bag and i forgot my felt story, so i need to borrow one from the teacher for our group recordings. today we had to record ourself reading a story to our peers for our teacher to review and give us some tips before we actually do it in the feild.

after this i go to lunch and i start to feel a bit better. this is because originally i thought i had five papers due next week but cause classes got switched around i know only have four. which means less work for me. and i can type up the two papers that i have not yet done on the desktop that we have at home. i also get a paper back from a class that has a b grade. which makes me happy. and makes me less stressed out about my grades. then my last class comes around. and i get a paper back at the end of that class. thinking that i did a good job on this paper i flip to the back eagerly to see my mark. and what do i see...a fucking F. why the hell did i get an F. well i want to say its because my teacher is a stupid fucking bitch, but when i look at the grading system she says its because i did not include my observations.

is she blind they are stapled right to the fucking page. she said they were rough drafts so she did not mark them as observations, because they were hand writen. well i would understand anyother time getting a bad mark in a post secondary insitution for handing in something hand writiten this pisses me off becuase earlier she said that it was better if it was handed in hand writen that way she knows that we actually did the fucking observations instead of just bullshiting it and typing it up. and now because mine happen to be hand writen she give me an f? does this not seem unfair to anyone else.

so im upset. so much so that i feel like im going to throw up, like im not good enough. i mean i have been buged and teased enough by friends saying how easy this two year course to be a preschool teacher must be. so how stupid do i feel if i cant even get a good mark in this, how stupid am i if i cant get good marks in this. i feel like a fucking retard, like a looser. if i cant do this how am i ever going to amount to any career. i fear that i will be one of thoes people stuck in shitty part time jobs for the rest of my life. and thats not me, thats not what i want to do. if im going to be here on this planet i want a job that actually has an effect on the world. one where i make no a difference. and working in some shitty part time job does not make a fucking difference in the world. teaching would if i can get fucking good grades. and jobs that my friends want to get into would like

karen,: she writes and she wants to be in the navy, at least there she will be making a difference. same with addy, and josh who is going to be a history teacher.

all these people get decent grades and are doing well why arnt i what the fuck is wrong with me, why do i feel so stupid and uncapable right now. im thinking about previous years i had in college like when i took some history courses how come i was able to get b+'s in thoees course and not in a fucking early childhood course. what is up with this. and i think and think about other things that interest me and getting some sort of degree in history, or art history sound pretty fucking awesome. i dont know how much of a difference it would make but it sounds cool. but then there is this little voice saying if you switch degress again your just a quiter, your giving up. you already did that once to your parents and now your going to do it again. i feel even worse switching and getting bad marks cause its my parents money not mine.

they saved and saved and saved so that i could get an good education and when i get bad marks it feels like im just slapping them across the face. i mean it would be different if i was spending my own money for school but im not, i dont have that money.

and now i feel helpless, and stupid and like a failure, im doing bad in two courses. even though i feel like im trying.

i dont know what to do, part of me say switch programs to history thats something you really find interesting. other say dont if you do your just a quiter and youll be costing your parents to much fucking money. and you will have waisted your time. another part of me says i should just struggle through this semester live with whatever marks i get and then take a year off to go traveling but then there is the voice saying its too late to do that, and you dont really have enough money. and once again you will be letting your parents down.

i really dont know what to do. like i said i feel like a failure and a disapointment.

i traped under a rock of bad grades

overall this has just been a really shitty day!!

zeppelinphan the super clutz

2009-11-16T18:45:00.000-08:00

i have come to the conclusion that how i am going to die is by triping over something down to my death. i am such a clutz. i triped three times today.

the first time was when my practium was done and i was walking up stairs away from my practicum towards the bus stop. i was texting at the time and i triped well walking up the stairs. luckaly i managed to do that retarted run thing to prevent myself from falling. i will consider this one my own fault becasue like i said i was texting and not really looking. im just considering my self lucky that as i triped i did not drop my phone. i have droped that thing so manytimes.

the second time was after school. my mom picked me up and we went to visit my uncle and chill at his house for a bit. my mom wanted to have a smoke before we went inside and she told me to go up the stairs and knock on the door. so i start walking up the stairs. but i trip on one of the steps and start to fall. the only thing that prevents me from falling on my face was the fact that my hand slammed on the door. then my mom looks up at me and was like "what kind of retarted knock was that" and laughs at me. i back off a couple steps to avoid embaressment when my uncle opens the door. and then we get invited inside.

the third and final time that i triped to day was a couple minutes ago. im sitting here on my lappy and i see that my mom takes a bag of chips out of the cubord. she says that i can have some so i step down and walk over to the bag of chips. but then i trip over my own pajama pants and once again to prevent my self from falling i put out my hands. this time i landed on my mothers bag of chips that are sitting on the table. and it makes a really loud CRUNCH. my mom looks at me and is like wtf are you trying to destroy my chips. then i tell her no i just triped. and she calles me claudet, because im such a clutz.

what a joyful day. this is why im probs going to die from tripping over something. probably over my own shoes or something and ill fall out of my appartment window.

stupid customers

2009-11-14T00:29:00.000-08:00

s i have not updated this blog in along time and i feel like i need to so this is probs going to be random considering that im starting to write it at 12:30 in the morning. but i was thinking about all of the stupid customers that come in at work. and i know that this is not a creative rant as there is a whole website dedicated to customer stupidity. but this blog entry is going to be about what customers have said and what i secreatly wish i could say in response.

stupid customer #
1) "hey do you work here"
actual response "yes can i help you"
what i wish i could say *sarcasim* "no i dont, im just standing here in a full uniform that happens to match the uniforms that all the emplyies that work here happend to be wearing. becasue i find it wonderfully fun and joy full to go into stores and fuck people over on my days off when i could be hanging with friends instead of being here"

2) this customer was standing right beside the frige with all the water
"do you sell water"
actual response: "yes it is right beside you, if you wanna grab it i can scan it in"
wish i could say: "did you even look, or are you so uncapable of doing anything that you have to ask without even trying to look for things"

3) "do you sell coffee"
actual response: no sorry but the starbucks right across from us does
wish i could say. "well if you turned around you would notice that the huge fucking store across from this little kiosk actually is a coffee shop. and being a kiosk there is no room for even a simple coffee maker so what makes you think i could make coffee"

thoes are what i wish i could have said now for story time. this stort is called lazy dumby

lazy dumby:

this lady is standing by the chocolate bars stairing at them and she is there for a fair amount of time so i assume that she just trying to decide what it is she wishes to buy. then after 20 minutes she grabs a coffee crisp waves it around and yells "EXCUSE ME.. CAN I GET SOME HELP OVER HERE". i look at her and say "yes, i would be pleased to help you if you could just walk over to the till i can ring in your purchas" "oh" she says. "well i guess that its my job to make things easier for you and not for you to make things easier for me" she walks around to the till and slams the chocolate bar on the counter. i ring it up and she starts to pay for her chocolate. then she continues on how she should not have had to walk around and how i should have come to her and i should have served her. now if this lady was in a wheel chair i would have been glad to do so seeing as the counters on the kiosk are high and its difficult to manuver around but seeing that she is a perfectly healthy female who has the ability to use thoes legs that god so generously gave her i figured she could manage to walk to the till.

any way after several minutes of her lecturing me on crappy service my politeness could only take so much and i looked up at her and said " im sorry mam, but i cannot physically pick up the till and movie it to whicever side of the kiosk that you wish. it is much eaier for you to just walk around". she does not have a response to this so she grabes her chocolate bar and walks off in a huff.

oh the joy of work. i cant wait till the days when i have a job were im actually exsited about going to work instead of dreading it and thinking in the back of my head. what the hell is going ot happen today

people who anny me on the bus

2009-11-03T08:00:00.000-08:00

people who annoy me on long bus rides.

1) the girls who wear too much perfume: okay wearing a little bit of perfume is fine but im talking about thoes people were you can smell them as soon as you walk into a room and you feel like your going to sufficate becasue you dont have anymore fresh air. its even worse when they continue to spray themselfs during the bus ride and you start coughing from the stench but they still dont take the hint. this happend to me once on an hour long bus ride from my house into victoria. dear god i wanted to punch this women in the back of the head because she was sitting right infront of me. why did i not move you ask? because the bus was full. why did i not open a window? because i was up stairs on a dubble decker. that was not fun. i spent the entire trip breathing into my sweater just so i did not have to smell her overpowering perfume. lets just say yes, i did take a big deep breath of fresh air as soon as i got off the bus.

2) people who open the windown during winter (cold, rain): this pissis me of because usualy the bus drive himself has to blast the heat just to keep people warm. and then some idiot who desides that he wants "fresh air" has to open the window. and when you ask them to close it they dont listen to you then just tell you to move away from the window. or there is the other senario for me were the person who opend the window is one of thoes bus creepers who you dont even want to talk to. there are also the ones who open the window who are big intimidating men, and me being a small cowerdly female dont have the guts to ask them to close the window. so in that perspective i guess becuase of my cowerdness i have not right to complain. but in all the other cases you find yourself sitting there shivering becuase this person wanted to open the window. also the onse that say they are too hot and are wearing like five layers. if your too hot, do every one else on the bus a favor and please take off your jacket, or some of your layers. we do not wanna be cold because of you

3) people who do not respect personal space: okay i get on the bus sometimes it is full and you all have to act friendly and squish together. it is understandable especially when your one of the people on the bus who is standing. but i do not get people really getting into your personal space when you have your own seats. ill give an example. so yesterday i was on the express but going down to school. and then this older lady sat beside me. normaly i prefure that if i have to sit beside someone on the bus that it be an older person. cause you can talk with them about stuff. and there is usualy less a chance that they will be a creeper. but this old lady sat down beside me pulled food out of her bag started eating and then was partially leaning over me so she could look out the window. i know i should have just asked her to traid seats that would have been a problem solver. but really lady, come on. if you want the window that bad you can ask. i dont need your food crumbs to fall into my lap just because you want to see view out of the bus window. its kind of annoying.

4) creepiers: if you have ever taken the bus you know these people. not to be sterotypical but all the creepiers on the bus are usualy men. its rare that i have run into a female creeper. they are the onse that will get on the bus and kinda stager. not becuase they have a mental dissability or anything but becasue they are sometimes drunk and its not that its a bad thing for people who have had to much to drink to get on the bus. but its the people that look dirty, smell bad, give you the really creepy vibes like oh my god please dont sit beside me please dont sit beside me. and its the fact that you probs on the 2 in the afternoon bus and they smell of alchole. I find that whenever i have the option for a double decker bus i go up stairs. it seems to wean out the creepiers. they dont go up stairs as often. i know i sound really judging people who might just be having a hard time in life. but like i said if you have ever taken a bus. especially if your female and you have taken the bus alone you know thoes vibes were your like hmmm something is wrong with that person. please for the love of god do not let them sit beside me.

those are all the people i have for now. im sure anyone who reads this can think of more types of annoying people on the bus. feel free to give me your examples in the comments.

the attack of the purity ring

2009-10-19T19:16:00.001-07:00

this is just a disclaimer before people read this. thoes who are sensitive to my sort of talk which involves sex. dont read. although in my mind this post is very tame:

story time yay. the attack of the purity ring

so i go over to karens house. and she is trying to pick a necklass to wear before we go out and hang out for the day. Then well looking through her jewlry cabnit she finds her old purity ring and this is what happens.

me: omfg karen why do you have a purity ring lol

her: lol that was from my christain days.

me: ha ha im going to put it on

her: um laura...y?

me: for the irony. the irony of the fact that. i am wearing a purity ring. rofl

her: omg. why am i friends with you

me: shut up you love me.

*addy walks into the room*

me: he he addy im wearing a purity ring. rofl IRONY

addy: *just makes that face like omg why laura*

.... 2 minutes later

me: uh karen i cant get it off....*pulls* shit its not comming off. *starts flailing and jumping around*. I CANT GET IT OFF I CANT GET IT OFF!!!

Addy: ha ha you cant have sex till your married now.

me : no no do not want get it of get it off i dont like this im being taken over by christain belife in a ring ahhhh get it off get it off.

karen: now your pure. no sex for you lol

me: FUCK PURITY i dont wanna be pure. get off my finger you stupid ring. ( in this time there was more profanity)
...and much more flailing i think i actually started spinning around well pulling on my finger well swearing hopeing that the stupid ring would come off.

me: I DONT WANNA BE MARRIED TO JESUS GET THIS THING OFF MY FINGURE!

karen: lol

finaly i got the ring off of my finger and threw it onto the floor. were it bounced and dissapeared under a blanket.

karen: umm Laura were did my ring go?

me: i donno im free to have sex now HA HA!! die ring die.

ya that was a fun day. same day i bought a lable maker. he he he so many things in karens room now say penis. <3

a question that came to my mind becasue of addy and karen

2009-10-14T17:45:00.000-07:00

what would you do with a drunken sailer early in the morning?

the lovely bones

2009-10-04T21:15:00.000-07:00

i read a book this weekend that i really enjoyed and found interesting. it was called the lovely bones. its basically about a girl who is fourteen. its the seventies. and in the begining of the book she gets raped and murdered by her neibour. the rest of the book is about her family coping in its different ways. welll the book is being nararated by the murderd girl whose name is suzie. i thought it was a really interesting book the way that it showed how her family tryed to cope with the murder. and it was also showing how carefully the neibour who murdered his was covering her tracts.

( warning spoilers so if you wish to read this book without knowing what happens further i suggest your stop reading this blog post. but if you dont care then read on)

throughout the book suzies dad suspects that it was the neibour all along and is trying to prove it. doing anything to find evidence. walking his dog past the house in the middle of the night trying to see if there is anything suspect. and also his other daughter who is still alive suspects it was that neibour also so she actually breaks into the guys house trying to find evidence and of course gets out of the house just in the nick of time. the book goes through the lives of the boy she liked who also happend to be her first kiss shows how he is coping and it shows how sometimes two people who might have not even acknolaged each other before seem to find each other when some one they both know dies. and how the people that seemed like her true friends dont seem that sad they just easily move on with there life.

all in all i thought it was a really good book. it keeped me drawn and a managed to read it in two days. which is good considering that i am a slow reader all in all.

although the book was good i dont think that i would read it again. this is mainly because i was disapointed in the ending. the ending did not satisfy me. i think this was mainly because every thing did not end up being perfectly fine with suzies family. as well as the fact that even though the person reading the book knows perfectly who killed suzie. the murderer gets away with it. he is never caught. although he does get killed by an icecle , from it falling on him. at the end of the book when he movies away but it still does not seem like justice enough.

i mean here is a family in this book that is compleatly suffering over the loss of there 14 year old daughter. there 13 year old daughter who is still alive ends up being talked about at school as the dead girls sister and going through that alot of her life because she is growing up in a small town.

suzies younger brother buckly starts off being an emo 4 year old over the loss of his favorite sister and by the end of the book he is a frustrated 12 year old who hates his family and wishes everyone would move on and have a normal life. his point of view is yes she is gone. and we are all still sad but fuck just move on (me paraphrasing of course)

then there is suszies mom who compleatly breaks when this happens. she realizes she never wanted to be a stay at home mom she wanted to work, she wanted to travel. she wanted to get out and do something. so in the middle of the book she cant take it anymore after loosing her daughter she just up and leaves. and you dont see her again till the end

then there is suzies father who because off all this has and emo family and has lost his favorite daugher (he does not say it but its implyed) and now his wife. of course she comes back but the family never gets fully back together.

every thing seems in shambles. i think the book might be to realistic for me. i think thats why i did not like the ending. were the family is still a bit broken and the murderer gets away. i know the author is probably trying to show that, that is real life. the bad guys dont always get caught. and things dont always work out. and sometimes you have to really really struggle through mass amounts of pain. in hopes of one day just finding a little bit of joy.

i prefure the happy endings that is why i read fiction. i dont like to read emo. although im sure i learn more from it.

anyway that is why the ending of the book was disapointing. i guess the one good happy ending for this book was the fact that suzie who was nararating after seeing her murderer get killed by and icicle and her family managaing to grab onto a little bit of hope. she herself could move on. go to "heaven". instead of being stuck watching her family and friends for about 8 years.

i still wish there was justice. i wanted to see the bad guy caughts. i wanted to read justice. but like i said. i think the author was trying to make the point that, thats not realy life. sometimes things dont get compleatly better.

either way I'm still a sucker for happy endings

Silverstein - True Romance lyrics

2009-09-30T18:19:00.000-07:00

I'm not here to judge you

I'm just here to tell you what you have done wrong.

Beautiful girl looking her best, takes off a towel,
Puts on a dress.
Fixes her hair to look good for someone.
Waits in a car to go to a motel.
...to a motel.

I may not always be perfect.
But I'll always try.
Will you say your prayers, just to be honest with yourself?
Will you save your soul? Is this what you wanted all along?
Husband can't bear to just lie to himself.
Stock market falls and he loses it all,
He sleeps alone for the third time this week.
He's become numb, he just wants this to be.

I may not always be perfect.
But I'll always try.
Will you say your prayers, just to be honest with yourself?
Will you save your soul? Is this what you wanted all along?

Blood on the floor.
What have you done?
Heart in your hands.
What have you done?

I may not always be perfect.
But I'll always try.
Will you say your prayers, just to be honest with yourself?
Will you save your soul? Is this what you wanted all along?

Beautiful girl sleeps by herself.
Half the bed's cold, she knows it's her fault.
She's given in and admitted defeat.
She'll be fine.

princess of the daycare

2009-09-24T17:29:00.000-07:00

true story of one of my days at practicum

(due to confedentiality agreement i am not allwed to say were the preschool is the teachers names or any of the kids names)

little girl: miss laura. i got stuff together for you to play dress up with me. do you want to come play

me: of course (inserte name here) i would love to

little girl: okay im going to dress you up now

--- the girl then preceds to put five necklaces on me. four braclets. a crown, a yellow featherd wig, a crown on top of the yellow feather wig, some sea shells on top of that crown and some strings of beads on top of that.

little girl: there. now your princess laura!!!

me: oh thank you.

class teacher: wow look at miss laura doesent she look silly

little girl: shes a princess

other little girls: I WANNA BE A PRINCESS DRESS ME UP.

original little girl: miss princess laura go look at your self in the mirror

me: i would love to but i have a fear if i move all the pretty things that you put on me will fall off

---i attempt to stand up and look in the miror. as i stand up i can feel and hear all the sea shells the wig and one of the crowns falling off my head. so i take everything else off so some of the girls can dress each other up

original little girl: oh no..all of your stuff came off. dont worry we can help you and dress you all back up again!!!!

---this happend about 3 or for times during the day. oh the joy of being a princess in a preschool setting :D

gahhh

2009-09-22T16:43:00.000-07:00

im coughing, im congested. im tired. i wanna sleep. i am gettin drained from school and i think it is happening faster becasue i am sick.

ahhh dieing. i just wanna get better. i dont like this feeling. i dont like having to breath out my mouth and have my lips become dried and chaped. i dont like feeling physically drained ..i get home and i just wanna sleep.

but i managed to slug through my homework today. luckly i have a mom who wants to look after me and make me feel better.

i really hope i get better soon if not for my sake, for the sake of the kids at the preschool that im working at. i will feel horrible if they catch a cold from me.

compleatly off topic..i have random urges to watch repo the genetic opera and my fair lady which is kinda funny cause even though thoes two movies are both musicals they are compleatly different.

school, my future, and my lack of social life.

2009-09-12T11:21:00.000-07:00

there is a saying that i heard, and that i also currently have as my facebook status. "sleep, a social life and good grades. you are in college you can only have two of the three". well looking at this year i am honestly believing that, that is true. i have six courses this semester and that is including a practicum. i think i might be running on lack of sleep because i think if i have to go an entire semester without seeing friends i might go a little crazy suffering from cabin fever or something.

but it will be worth it at the end of these two years. i was talking with some of the girls that are in my ECCE classes (early childhood care and education). if you did not know already that's what I'm going to school for. to be a preschool teacher. there was one girl who got offered a job already that is how desperate this job market is. apparently the girl who runs the preschool that she was volunteering at said that when she was done her two years at college getting the degree that she should go back and she will get a job at that daycare. other girls in my class were saying things like oh ya..there are so many preschools in Victoria that are desperate good trained workers its ridiculous. and i have been hearing that they are very desperate for work down at the military base.

but as i look around and i see all these girls in my class a little bit of worry comes over me. oh shit yes these are girls that i am going to be come close friends possibly with some of them because i will have every class with them. but when school is done, and we have graduated. all these girls will be all the people i will be competing with for the jobs out there. where i will have to prove that i am the one that should be hired....that will be fun *note sarcasm*.

i get a little bit less worried about competing with them when i hear a large group of the girls saying that they are just getting this degree so they can have a temporary job that makes them more money then there currant job. then they can go to uvic and get a different degree. hmm so that knocks down some of the competition, but it seems that a lot of the girls in the class don't see this degree as something that will lead to a career but instead a temporary job.

i on the other hand am looking at it as a career opportunity. something that i wanna do with my life because its what i enjoy doing. but there is the little voice inside me wondering if i am going about the wrong way seeing as a good deal of people in my class are not seeing this future job as a career. should i be worried by that? or happy because i will have a little less competition when i graduate.

another thought do i want to work as soon as i do graduate. if i can find a good paying job right away sure. but i don't know what the chance of that really is. even though it sounds good from talking with the girls in my class.

i was thinking more along the lines of traveling when i graduate. there are so many programs were if your young and in your twenties you can go to another country and work in orphanages, or work in preschools. and you can go and do that for a year. that is what i think i would really like to do once i graduate. cause when i graduate i will be 22 that will still be really young. i would rather have the degree then go and work with children that really need help in some orphanage in another country. kids that need the workers and the help. it will be draining. but that is what i wanna do. that seems as more of a way to make a difference then in the preschools here. not that i would not love to work with kids here.

anyway this tangent should probably come to an end. to summarise. i hope i don't die from school this year. i really wanna travel to another country and work in an orphanage or something when i graduate. but if i get offered a good paying job were the people cannot wait for me to come back, or travel for a little bit i guess i will have to take it so i don't come back from traveling with no job opportunities.

do i think to much about my future?

back in san fran from L.A

2009-08-30T21:44:00.000-07:00

I'm going to try and make this quick because Fiona is sitting beside me trying to use facebook. yay for point form summarising what has happened to us.

-woke up went to la
- got tricked into going into the airport
-at to pay 13 extra dollars to get to hostel by shuttle, shuttle driver got lost, and thought we were from England could not get it in his head that we were from Canada. thought we drove on the left side of the road...he did not shut up
- had to share a bed the first night cause we got there so late
- got half price for sharing a bed
- went to beach
- got burned
- went to beach again
- got burned again
- meet stalker...bought us alchol. would not leave us alone
- he got the hint and left
- partied with people from all over the world in hostel
- got drunk threw oranges at Swedish guy
- got drunk climbed on roof
- flimed myself and Australians climbing on roof
- went to knots berry farm
- went to Hollywood
- chilled by beach tyred to stay covered cause i turned red from the sun. it hurt to wear underwear.
- came back today
- went shopping
- tyred to up date blog in point form.

having a blast missing every one Fiona's still waiting for computer so that's why this is my attempt to say what happened well keeping it short. miss you guys.

day 3 in cali

2009-08-22T19:26:00.000-07:00

so last night fiona and i decided to go and look for china town. that was lots of fun. and there was a crap load of cheep gift stores down there. i have so far bought as of today william, rachel and matthew oh also my mom gifts. i also bought myself something else. anyway ya china town was cool. all lit up at nght. looked like a mini vegas. then we walked through little italy, i felt like i was actually in italy. it was weird. walking through one part were everyone was speaking chines to every one speaking italian.

we took the trolly back to the hostle last night. our hostle is clean and nice. its funny thought cause its right across the street from the hilton.

today we went to fishermans warf again. lots of cool shops. wanted to go to alcatras but its sold out. there was a music box store and there was a tiny gift bag phantom of the opera music box. me being me could not resist buying it. there were bigger ones that were actual snow globs but i did not wanna try and get that back without it breaking. bought my moms gift at the market aswell.

here is a hint mom: its a shirt.

not going to tell you what it says but i think you will like it. cause well i like it and you seem to like to steal my cloths so i think youll like it.

we wanted to see golden gate bridge today but they are doing construction so maybe we will have better luck next time. for tonight we are just haning out in the hostle with people. because we have to wake up early and catch a bus to LA tommorw.

still having a blast

dont worry addy ill get you candy from disney land!!

day two in california

2009-08-21T20:02:00.000-07:00

its my second day here in san francisco. so far fiona and i have had fun. this is going to be a quick post cause im heading out soon to go and explore china town so dad, and other editors please try and ignore all spelling errors.

we wondered down to castro today and took lots of pictures of rainbow flags. and i bought my friend stephan a present. sorry stephan but its not what you wanted cause i dont wanna get stoped at customs on the way back with a calender from castro in my bag..that would be embarassing. we also went to hight and ausbery(i know im saying that wrong). omg soo many pot shops. and hippy stores. i bought myself a shirt.

last night fiona and i wondered around till like ten at night. we walked down to fishermans warf and back that was fun. there was a random band set up infront of old navy.

anyway im having lots of fun. and im staying safe.

ps fiona and i saw a drag queen kinda in castro and wanted to take our picture with him but thought he would be offended if we asked. oh well. he seemed cool.

dont worry mom and dad. everythings good

going to california

2009-08-19T18:00:00.000-07:00

today is my last day at home. then i am heading off on a plane with fiona towards california. hoping to be a hippy in san francisco . chill on the beach in santa barbra, and hit up as many amusment parks as we have money for in L.A. it should be a party full of adventures and i am exsited to get off of this little island that i call my home for a bit.

fiona who i am traveling with is bringing her laptop i belive, or at least she said that she was the last time that we talked. so i will try to update this blog with anything interesting that happens to us in the next two weeks.

im exsited. dont worry i will come back.

peace, love, rock and roll <3

a night out with mom

2009-08-12T16:41:00.000-07:00

last night i was bored and i decided that i would hang out with my mom. i know not the normal choice of a young adult on a afternoon when one could be out partying with friends and such. but i desiceded that i have not hung out with her in a while and it would be good to just go out to a movie with her and hang out. and there were a number of things that i discovered/learned when i went out with my mother last night.

1) mothers are way to easy to freak out when your driving: weather you are doing this on purpose or not. my mom started getting uneasy when i was driving a little bit over the speed limit and i only had one hand on the stearing wheel. being the irrisponsible young adult that i am. when my mom starts lecturing me to drive better. i start to drive worse. in my mind this seems like a better way to get her off my back then telling her to be quiet. this results in her yelling and me driving worse untill she shuts up and backs off and i start driving like a civilized person again. you would think my mom would stop being a back seat driver cause if she keeps that up one day she is going to kill us all.

2) its scary how the little things make you realize just how much like your mother you really are: so we were both sitting in the teater watching a movie. we were laughing at the same points at the same times. and there was one point in the movie were i was leaning against the arm rest with my hand under my chin. my left leg crossed over the right, my foot swining, and my left arm resting on my lap. and i looked over at my mom and she was doing the exsact same thing. i started to wonder did one of us subconciasly copy the other or is this just in our genes.

3) mom can make fun of old people too: it was so funny there was this old lady in the teater who keeped yelling oh no..oh no..no no no..oh no. she was getting to into that movie. and my mom and i started laughing everytime we herd her say it. then on the drive home my mom actually commented on it and we both started randomly yelling oh no and laughing even more.

4) with my mom sometimes i can talk about anything: so on the drive home from the movie. for some reason the topic of sex came up. i dont remember why or how but it did. (note for readers: not that im planning on having sex anytime soon but you know the topics do come up) in the end my mom ended up saying something like well just make sure you love they guy when you do anything. and use protection. and if you do get pregnant...ill take the kid, if your not ready. i could not help but laugh..leave it to my mom to take a serious conversation and turn it into her some how getting another little kid to look after... and i also really liked the fact that she actually had a conversation with me instead of using the parental bullshit scare tactics to prevent ones daughter from having sex. like i said not anytime soon just good to talk.

ya so that was a fun night. who would have thought you could have inside jokes with your mother...and have a blast.

OH NO OH NO..NO NO NO rofl

derailed train of thought on censorship

2009-08-02T23:41:00.000-07:00

hello two people who read my blog it has been a while. so i have something to say. and i am going to start off by saying very bluntly this is not going to sound as good as any rant does in my head. because that is always the case. but i think this is something that needs to be said because it has been floating around in my head for a while. and i know that i have ranted about this in person before to some of my friends.

do some parts of the society that we live in seem like a double standard. for example we are allowed to have free speech. but then there are certain words in society that we are not supposed to say. these words are classified as bad. (i think George Carlin did the best rant about this but i still need to rant anyway). why are words considered bad. it is not written in any official papers that the word fuck or ass or bitch or cunt (sorry dad if your reading this blog i know you don't like your daughter using these words) or any other number of words considered bad. why do people chose to take a simple thing and label it as wrong or bad or demeaning. why are things being so weird in this society?

why is nudity no longer considered liberating in are society like it once was in the 60's and 70's why are people always trying to censor these freedoms. let me put it this way i have gone skinny dipping a number of times. and when i laugh and tell my mom or my dad that i have done this they are fine with it.. they tell me stories of how people would do it all the time when they were growing up. you would just go to a lake and swim ,bathing suit would not matter. it was just normal. but if i were to tell the exsact same story to some of my more ...lets say Christan friends. they would start to feel uncomfortable and wonder why in the world would i want to go swimming naked with a bunch of my friends why would i not want to have some "decency" and stay covered.

my question is why is the human body being seen as something to be covered and something to be ashamed off? why are people being taught from different angles not to feel confident. did you know legally it is okay for a women to walk down the street without a shirt on? guys can do it and so can we. but you never will see a girl do that. not that I'm yelling and saying hey girls its summer take your shirt off, get out there. because i can not see my self walking down the street without a shirt. well maybe if i was wearing bra. that's another thing. why is it such a big deal if a girl is walking around in her underwear. *gasp* omg not something that looks exsactly like a bathing suit (note sarcasm).

words and our body's are being censored and claimed bad. i get dirty looks or scolded if i was to just walk around naked and start yelling out swear words. like fuck this and fuck that. i will admit i do censor my self around little kids because in that department it is the parents choice..to is appropriate i guess. but around any one else i should be able to say fuck and hell and shit ass,cunt dick, slut(side not seems more girls, or at least in my group are bringing this word back and using it in a loving term, slut,bitch and whore is a new way of saying hey bud i love you). but you know i really don't get it. words are powerful that i understand and yet some of them are not supposed to be said. we are told by people that we are young and to get up and speak our mind but not to speak our mind if it includes certain things. speak your censored mind, speak your mind if it is appropriate for all to hear. fuck that shit.

i wanna sing loud in the sunshine and pray hard in the rain. and if i chose to do so, naked, swearing and covered in mud. that should be my choice. (urge to go streaking in the rain on a muddy day growing)

there are so many issues in this world that involve politics, and the earth that i could be jumping on but for some reason the one that bugs me the most is censorship. i think that's why i buy random movies about a kid starting his own radio show so he can say whatever the hell he wants. why i like watching movies that push the limits like anything Kevin smith that has done. people my not agree with me on this but i think weather you like him or not you have to admit that Seth mcfarline is a pretty influential guy on today's generation. he pushes the limits on what is and is not appropriate to be shown on TV. he makes his audience uncomfortable. and sometimes the things in his show family guy can seem just plain stupid. but you know if you look at it. you can also ask yourself why am i offended by what he is showing? why do people find the need for this to be censored? why was this showed never aired?

question your feelings!!! ask yourself why you think somethings are appropriate and others not. why do some words like slut or bastard or queer hurt yet others might not?

and example of this going back to this is the whole language and power of words thing. I'm going to use the word fag. people use this as a negative towards gay people all the time but it does not have to be like that. i remember talking with my dad about my uncle who just so happens to be gay. and my father used the word fag. i was immediately taken back by this..wonder how my dad could use that word. seeing it as wrong at the time. i asked him dad why would you say this word... especially considering that your talking about your brother. my dad started to explain to me how it is not the word itself that is bad but it it how you use it. i then asked my dad if he ever called my uncle a fag to his face. my dad said yes. i then asked if my uncle minded. my dad said no. i paused to think about this conversation and realized how absolutely right my dad was about this whole statement. it is not the words that are bad it is how you use them and say them.

i donno. censorship pisses me off. i am getting tired of censoring myself. i don't swear at home because my parents don't want it to come out of me. but i swear with my friends. some would say its a youth way of rebellion but if that is so then how come you see groups of "grown" adults act the same?

this train of thought is slowly coming to and end. or derailing and coming off the tracts because i don't no how to end it. so i think i will end of saying something that was said in that movie that i bought and just watched about the kid who started his own radio station.

talk hard. don't be afraid to say what you feel, and stand up for your actions.

also here are some recommended viewings

7 words by George Carlin http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmZfYyctiuo

and a video by a YouTube viewer that i like : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rPjzJUG1l0

if you have parents in the room who you have to censor yourself around i suggest you wear head phones for the first vid. enjoy

frustrated laura is frustrated

2009-07-24T14:43:00.000-07:00

yay for a bad day. i hate thoes days were you wake up and they end up being bad partly because of your own grumpyness but mainly just becasue bad events. so it started bad with me waking up at 4:40 which i had to wake up for because i had to work at five thirty. but i was kinda grumpy. so most of work was good. the customers were not that bad. sometimes they can be massive jerks but that is only because they are grumpy themselfs because they are stuck in an airport or something. on my breaks i personally made my bad day worse i think. not going to go into it but i did. then at 12:30 the red head showed up. now if you have read my blog before you will know right away that she is the reason for most of my strife at work. she has made alot of people unhappy and im sure the only reason why my boss has not fired her is becasue we are so desperate for people to work right now that she needs the employee. so the red head showed up complaining about the state of the kiosk and then procesded to start doing random tasks instead of cashing in like she is supposed to.

me getting frustrated cashed out and got out of there not wanting to wait to see what else she will want to lecture me with. then when i get to the other side of security to work at the main store. guess who calls the main store to complain? if you guessed the red head your right. she starts complaining about how i did not bring anything over and how its not fair to her. and all that other bullshit. so i politly try to explain that normally when coworkers come over to take over the kiosk they call first and see if there is anything that needs to be brought over because it is not fair for the morning person to have to bring stuff over in the morning, and then bring stuff over for the afternoon person as well. but did the red head listen. oh no she continues to lecture me compleatly ignoring what i just said. so i tell her to make a list and we will sort out getting her the things that she needs.

2 minutes later after this conversation she calls again. and another coworker answeres and says that the red head is specifically asking for me. again she is talking to me on the phone for ten minutes lecturing me, saying that i need to get stuff done and all that crap, be more effecient. eventually i look over and see my other coworker motioning for me to just hang up. so i tell the red head that im busy and that there is lots to do and lots of customers so i have to go and get back to work, i cant stay on the phone and talk with her. i think the offends her becasue in an angry tone she kinda says "well i have work .. and customers to. bye" then get this she fucking hangs up on me. what the hell. okay. then becasue she refuses to talk with me for the rest of the shif (which i dont mind but is kind of childish). she is getting the security gards at the airport to deliver the list of things that she needs.

instad of just picking up the phone and calling us so we can write everything down. omg this coworker is enought to make me want to quit. and the sad thing is no one else in the store likes her either. after we got the list. no one wanted to actualy go over to the other side and give the stuff to her for fear of hearing her rant and complain and all of her usual bull shit.

so that was part of the bad day. then when i got out of work i called a friend thinking i was going to hang out. which she still wanted to but we were originally go swimming but that go cancelled. i was totaly cool with that but i thought i should be nice and call my mom and let her know the change of plans.

we were going to go swimming at the beach down by a family friends house. so i was going to grab there cool 12 year old daughter karlee and make her come down to the beach with us. so when i called mom she said that she told karlee that we were comming and that she was exsited to go swimming and such.

great now im thinking i have to tell a 12 year old who loves to hang (and make fun of me) that we are not comming afterall. this turns into an argument with my mom asking her why she had to tell karlee that we were comming cause now we have to tell her we are not. and i get to be the royal bitch who just cancelled on her becasue the overall group does not want to go to the beach. so now we have an angry mom.

then as i get off the phone and start to walk to my car to go. i get attacked by a fucking crow. this stupid bird flew up and attacked me right in the head. i think it might have scrached it. i think it has babys or something close by. cause it was attaking everyone near the airport entrence. no one warned me. fucking bird i think im going to take a base ball bat to work. kill the fucking thing.

then i saw my manager go into work. and she was talking with my other coworker who i think was ranting about the red head on my behalf. so now my boss is probs having to deal with the red head. and getting an earfull about me

every one but the red head likes me at work. the red head actually said to my boss that i should be fired for doing nothing. I DO MORE THEN HER. at least i dont complain 80% of the fucking time im at fucking work.

forget the crow maybe i can take a bat to the red head lol..jk of course.

so now im calming down and making myself feel better with some vinyl(records) and junkfood

god i hope tommorow is better

adventures

2009-07-20T19:55:00.000-07:00

you have to love adventures. even if they dont work out the way that you would like them to. so addy, karen and desided to go up island to courtney on an adventure. we took the train up there and back. this is going to disapoint karen a bit but i am not as much of a train enthusist as she is. i would rather go on a road trip. i mean. i would definitly chose the train over the grey hound cause its more comfortable and its cheeper. but if i had the option to drive i would. anyway so sunday morning we get up early and we catch the ten oclock train. this is a five hour train ride (so long) but it was fun. there were lots of pictures taken on that train ride. there were actually lots of pictures taken in general on that trip but alot of them were taken on the ride up.

then once we got to courtney it was a ten minute walk to our hotel. we chilled for a bit then addy and i desided to go on a quest for irn bru. but this irn bru was not technicly in courtney. oh no that would be way way way to easy. it was supposed to be in quality foods in comox. so addy and i desided to go for a long walk to the store. i was stupid as usual and wore jeans. so we walked an hour and a half in the scortiching heat to comox. when we got to qality foods they were out of irn bru. (fuck fuck fuck). oh well we had an adventure although im pretty sure that i got a bit of heat stroke because i had a burning head ache for the rest of the night. addy felt pretty bad and i was kind of a bitch and buged her about it a bit to much. i was joking but sometimes that can go to far. we took a taxi back to our hotel so that we would not have to walk an hour and a half in the heat to get back. that was like 20 bucks right there to get back.

once we got back i desided to go for a swim in the pool with karen to cool off. addy went up the road to look at the lybrary. then i kinda just zoned out in the hotel room grabing my head trying to make the trobbing pain go away. and addy went for a walk. and checked out hot shirtless guys apprently and got comments on her awesome shirt. which is actually my led zeppelin houses of the holy shirt. (addy i want that shirt back. i will lend you a different zeppelin shirt if you want but i want that one,). then karen and i took some amusing videos. which addy was included in later once she got back.

fiona was supposed to hang with us but unfortinitly she did not get out of camp untill around ten and did not show up till around 10:30-11. the sleep was not that great there were people yelling and running up and down the hotel slaming doors and knocking like crazy. silly drunk people. it was not untill about 2 in the morning that i could not take it anymore so i called the front desk and complained and eventually it got quiet and i got some sleep.

then the next day (today) was full of the train ride back. i actually sleeped for most of that. it was cute though at one point i woke up and in the seat across the aisl from me there was this little kid and she was waking up from sleeping also. we both sort of had that sort of grogy sort of just woke up stare on us. and we were both kinda out of it and looking at each other. so i waved at her. and she waved back. she was cute.

also as i stared out the constant amount of trees going by the little kid in me was thinking how awesome it would be to just live in a giant tree house. not like a kids tree house. but to actually have enough money to hire professionals to build an actual house that could be in trees and live in it. then i started thinking if i was that ritch and i actually did that i would not want just to live in a tree house paradise. although it would be awesome. i would want to actually do something with my life. i mean if i was that ritch i would still want to be a preschool teacher. then i thought.

OMG

how awesome would it be to have that much money build a tree house/ preschool. aslong as it was safe enough. how many kids would want to go to that school. how awesome it would be. well i guess my house would be higher up in the tree. the school would have to be lower, so incase kids fall they did not hurt. basically not in the tree at all. but still it would be pretty freaking awesome.

then after this thought i fell asleep again. dreaming about wonderfull things such as living in a tree. being like tarzan and jane. running away from civilizaton and just living in the woods.

if only.

coughing and dieing

2009-07-17T10:40:00.000-07:00

im sick im tired and i feel gross. i am running on high lack of sleep becasue last night i was not able to sleep due to the fact that i was coughing my lungs out most of the night. my lips hurt becasue my nose was pluged and i had to sleep with my mouth open. sure my nose is fine when im awake but as soon as i want to sleep its pluged. i feel sweaty and gross becuase i think this is a feaver. i keep coughing. it wont stop. my dad is in the other room working. my mom is at work. all i want right now is for my dad to be like laura your to sick to go to work. go back to bed i will call them. i feel disgusting, and i just want someone to look after me.

i know that im 20 but is it wrong for me to still kinda want to be looked after when im sick? i cant call in sick my self becasue everytime i try they make me come in anyway. and pluse i will feel guilty becasue they did just give me this upcomming monday off so that i can go on an adventure up to courtney with addy and karen. i really hope im better by then. i mean its not like i can cancell on them or they are out money and cant go up becasue they need an adult (someone 19 or older) to check into the hotel. and thats me. so either way i am going to go. i just really dont wanna go and get addy and karen sick. i dont wanna make them suffer from lack of sleep becasue i am coughing all night.

my dad had this same flu or whatever it was well i was hosue sitting at stephans. and he said it lasted him a week. oh fuck i really hope it does not last a week. ..im coughing alot still. i was in my bathroom and i coughed so much i felt like i was going to throw up. i hate it when that happens. ahhh please let me be better by sunday. or at least make it so im no longer coughing in the middle of the night i dont wanna keep my friends up. maybe if i take one of karens sleeping pills i will be out of it. and wont cough and then they can get sleep also.

ahh i dont want to go to work. im exausted i just want to crawl back into my bed and attempt to catch up on some of the sleep that i did not get last night.

i want someone to look after me well im sick.

chocolate the unicorn

2009-07-15T23:44:00.000-07:00

once apone a time there was a little unicorne his name was chocolate

chocolate wanted to rule the world

but there was one thing that was preventing him from doing tha. that was the lack of aposable thumbs

how could a unicorn rule the world if he cant even open a door?

so chocolate when on a mission to find a dr that would give him an abosable thumb

he first clinic he went up to looked friendly enough

but when he got there he saw that there were protesters holding up sighns and yelling things

saying things like to give a unicorn aposible thumbs was an abomnation against god, and that if god wanted unicorns to have thumbs they would have been created with them

chocolate thought that these people were silly

chocolate the unicorn was pro choice to getting aposible thumbs. were these people were pro originality. they belived that he should stay the same

feeling uncomfortable around all the crazy protesters chocolate desided to go to a different clinic to get thumbs

but as he keeped seeing the good ones he also saw more and more protesters getting ruder and ruder. feeling uncomfortable and ashamed becasue they were putting him down. chocolate continued to look for a doctor without protesters that would give him a thumb

finaly he had to go to a back ally one. were it was cheep and dirty but the doctor was willing to give him a thumb. and there were no protesters because no one knew where this pace was unlike the clean safe hospital places were all the protesters were that were getting all up in chocolates face and frightend him

unfortinitly the doctor at the back ally hospital did not have a dr degree so he was not a real dr. and he killed chocolate. chocolate would have lived if he had access to a safe place to get a thumb. but he did not. because crazy protesters were alway harrasing him....THE END

up comming adventure

2009-07-15T16:40:00.000-07:00

question. what happens when you mix an addy with a laura with a karen

--- addy+ laura+karen

then you add un the urge for irn bru

-----addy+ laura+ karen+ irn bru

then add in the 438 km round trip to and from courtney to get the iron bru

-----addy + laura+ karen+ irn bru+ 438 km

----then minuse about 80 dollers each so thats about 240 dollers

---- addy+ laura+ karen+ irn bru+ 438 km
______________________________
240 dollers

dont forget some how round/factor in the exsitement. or giddy girlness. not to mention others might be comming. and all the general all around crazy ness that happens with us so

1000% CRAZYNESS times two (addy+ laura + karen+ iron bru + 483 km)
________________________________________________________
lack of sleep (240 dollers)

==EPICLY EPIC ADVENTURE

this sunday and monday are going to be fun!!!!

grumpy

2009-07-10T11:30:00.000-07:00

ahh so i did not get a good night sleep. it was too hot. i could hear stephans hampster in its cage most of the night. the dog barked several times. the tenants were playing some kinda of music that had to much base for me to just tune out and sleep through. then some neibour decided to get out a power washer which was really loud that i could hear from here. the other neibour's kids have not stoped yelling. which i can understand kids yell and have fun but when your tired and grumpy its like ahhh what the fuck.

i feel sweaty and gross because it was way to hot last night but i dont have time for a shower cause i have to go to work soon.

im grumpy so im jelouse of addy who gets to just stay home and chill today. more and more latley my days off have just felt not that relaxing. my days off have not be days to myself. now dont get me wrong i love hanging with my friends and most of the time i do it is because it was my idea in the first place. but it is catching up with me. and realy making me wonder why people work there whole life in jobs that they hate. i am so glad i am going to school in september to learn to become a preschool teacher. a job that will no doubt make me tired just as much as anyother job would. but at least i will enjoy it. instead of waking up in the morning and thinking fuck, i have to go to work again.

i really wanna go to the lake. it is so hot out. and the last time i was supposed to go to the lake it rained.

maybe i can convince someone to wake up early and go to the lake with me on sunday before it is too busy and that way. i will still have time to come home and get changed to go out to the dress up dinner.

things are getting broken at the hosue we are house sitting. from the dog and other stuff. i dread having to explain this to the people who own the hosue when they get back.

im getting home sick for my own house. i miss my bed. and my room. i miss my family. even thought my dad sometimes has an overlywittyness and likes to make fun of me. but that is okay.

when i get off work today i am comming back to stephans, having a shower, putting on my pjs and doing nothing.

i dont want to hang with people. maybe ill just read a book or put in a movie.

the budz mom wants me to hosue sit for two weeks when im done house sitting here. i said id think about it but in all honesty i really dont want to. i just want to go home.

i need to get my full licence still ahhh
i need to get better at driving standard.

i cant fucking wait till im off this rock and out in california. its getting to the point were stimple things that is should be exsited about like getting my licence are starting to feel like a chore becuase im thinking to much about time and money and obligations.

this is fucking stupid. get me out of here

I WANT TO BREAK FREE

40 days till california

more thoughts of my wondering mind

2009-07-07T16:12:00.000-07:00

its really easy to make matty hyper and run at tackle people (talking about the dog not my bf ...although if i bribed with cookies maybe :P)

shannon and addy can be really bipolar when they play video games at first its a hell of a lot of swearing and saying fuck and then they start singing im walking on sunshine. ha ha. i love my friends. shannon can actually sing. kinda makes me wonder why she never joined choir or something were she could make her voice even better and emphasize the talent and have other people hear it. oh well i guess some like to share there talent and other love to hide it away and wait for it to be discoverd.

i bought a shirt at blue notes the other day. because it screamed hippy to me. i love the who hippy thing. but i find it kinda ironic that im buying new cloths to look like a hippy when true hippies go thrift shops. i really wanna go downtown to value village sometime and raid there. i always come out with something cheap that fits. thrift stores are fun if you go on treasure hunts.

i really want an old army jacket. i think it would be cool. people tell me to go check out army surplus stores.but part of me does not want to give them money. i am determined to find a cool one in a thrift store or something.

work is not to bad but there are somedays when i am like why the fuck am i here. just because it makes me tired. i come to work at fivethirty in the morning today and all ready i get a phone call from ze boss. saying that stuff is getting done wrong and that i need to take the chair out of the kiosk before i start working because people are sitting and not working.

i find this a bit annoying because when your in a kiosk and everything is stocked its kinda nice to just sit...when there are no customers i mean i understand not sitting when there is a line up and people you could be convincing to sell stuff to. but there are times when there is no one to sell things to. there can be an hour or so before people show up casue everyone left on the airplane. so gahhh.

and i got off work late today cause a coworking is sick with shingles. dang.

ha ha ha shannon is swearing at addy again. yelling stuff about bannans saying that she should eat them. addy saying she does not want to eat the bannana. shannon has a boger out her nose and she cant get it. she almost lost the game picking her nose. saying that it was addys turn to win anyway. now they are in a desert.

ahh i have to work early tommorow also. but hey i get to sleep in on thrusday cause no work yay. and im going to sleep after work tommorow because i said i would hang with william when he gets off of work and i dont wanna be compleatly dead tired and end hanging out early because of my lack of sleep.

omg omg omg 43 days till im backpacking in cali with fiona.

and that involves a mini road trip to seatle with natasha.

its going to be fun.

ha ha ha shannon is going to kill me when she reads this blog and notises that i mentioned that she picked her nose. now the whole interwebs nows that she does that tehe

i have to hang with people more. matt especally, stupid tiredness, and stupid work. even thought it give me money for tavel and school books

okay this post is getting to ADD so i think im going to have to stop OH SHINNY THINGS

my wondering mind

2009-06-30T16:48:00.000-07:00

i find it interesting how our minds skip from one topic to the next here is an example for me how i was thinking at work:

owww my sholder blade hurts.
i think i pulled a muscel
its getting better hopefully it stays that way
i google sholder blade pain and two main things came up although i dont trust google i have one of two things happend. either
a) i pulled a muscel, or
b) i have cancer

i highly doubt its cancer considering that google is not a doctor and also considering the fact that it does not hurt as much as it did two days ago it cant be cancer.
cause according to google it can only be cancer if it stays the way it is or gets worse.
stupid google thinking i have cancer.
that would really suck if i had cancer.
i would hate to go through all that treatment.
what would happen if i got cancer and then was told i only had a month or less to live. like that guy in the movie one week.
i dont know what i would do...but i wonder how many people would be sad about me dieing.
well i know people will be sad but what would be the depth of their sadness.
who would cry???? would karen cry she never crys but i think she would cry.
would addy cry...i think so also but i can also see her just having alot of rage.
i have no idea what shannon or chris' reactions would be...they would be sad, i hope. but would chris cry...i dont see him crying. not because it was me but because i just cant picture him crying.
now would shannon show rage or sadness....i donno.
fiona would be sad i know that for sure.
what about matt....oh god i dont want to think about that

why am i thinking about peoples reactions if i were to die. why does it make me happy to think of them being sad over the fact if i died.

i think its because knowing that they are sad over me being gone in a weird sort of way deffinitly shows how loved i am. even though i know that im loved.

love is a word that gets thrown around way to offten. and it is losing its purpose. i myself am guilty of doing this even though i try not to. even with simple things like i love my convertable. oh man i really have to practise driving more so i can drive that car. then i have to get my full licence. but that costs money. and i want my money to go towards california with fiona. so we can have fun and dress like hippies. that will be fun. i like being a hippy even though it annoys will.

sometimes its fun annoying will i should stop doing that. i know sometimes i cross the line and get away with it just because im a girl. which is stupid i should stop doing that and start considering things. okay zeppelinphan try not to annoy william.....as much. cause i feel bad when i annoy him. and then he retaliates. and then matt trys to defend me. then william is mad at both of us...and matt seems mad at him. thats not good. i feel like im damaging there friendship. i never want to be that girl friend that damages friendships. i allways hated thoes girls. so i dont wanna be one of the people i hate...

owww my sholder still hurts

fuck my mind

2009-06-27T12:18:00.001-07:00

i am starting to wonder if i can take some classes to get me to calm the fuck down and stop over reacting. i am one of thoes people who always thinks up the worst possible senerio. i will give you an example of this.

say im walking home (i walked home alot in high school so shut up this works) and well im walking home this a car behind me starts to slow down. now most normal people in this world would start to think hmm well sence my house is near the ferries. they are probs slowing down to get to the ferries or to make the turn off. or maybe they are slowing down to ask directions. or maybe they live up around here and they are slowing down to turn up their drive way. but no no no none of that goes in zeppelinphans mind right away because i am the pro at overacting. the thoughts that go on in my head are. why the fuck is a car slowing down behind me. what does the driver want. maybe i should not get to close to the car..girls do get abducted.

and all these other weird senerios i used to start thinking where if it was a creeper in the car slwoing down behind me i would think in detail weather it was better to try to run to a house near by but then oh no i dont know how the people in thoes houses maybe they are creepers also..then id be fucked even more. and what if the creeper in the house and in the car know each other then i am so dead.

and my over thinking like this would actually escalade untill i got home. and i would realize wow im fucked.

i do this whole overthinking senerio shit with my friends. when i cant hear from one i start to worry that something happend. it does not help when i call there house and there parental gardian thinks that they are with me.....and i dont know what to say to them. i should stay calm but then i start to think. why would my friend tell there parental gardian that they are with me. and not tell me. i mean i dont mind lying for my friends depending on what they are going to do or wear they are going but i would like to be filled in on the fact that they are supposed to be with me so i know this.

otherwise i get worried no only that but i feel like im fucking over my friends in saying actually im sorry but they are not with me i was actually calling to find out where they are...shit.

then i once again think of worse case senerio insstead of remaing calm and thinking where are they normallywhen they are not home. and i stupidly start calling places instead of staying calm and i picture my friends in the worse case senerio and i try to think of what i can do. and i escallade situations instead of giving that friend his/her space like i should.

and this tends to not turn out good.

i really need to find some kind of school to that will teach me to calm the fuck down. becuase otherwise im eventually going to push someone over the edge.

cause as of yet..my over reacting/ overthinking situations has not helped situations but in fact made them worse.

2009-06-25T16:26:00.000-07:00

so im house sitting. and i dont have my lappy becasue only a certain number of compys can hook up to the wireless. i tryed adding favorites in stephans computer so i have a couple. i found some of my regualar websites that i check. but i also notised that some peoples blogs dont have a follow option so i am not able to read thoes blogs...matt i need your blog link. and if anyone can recomend good websites to check out. if your going to recomend comics i already found least i could do, explosm, girls with sling shots, ctr-alt-del, and xkct or something. anyway yes.

today was fun we bought steak and went to the scottish butcher and have had fun so far and shannon and i and possibly fiona are going to go and see transformers tonight so that should be fun.

anyway addy is making dinner and i should go and help her with that. because we are all going to be eating it and its not fair to make her do all the work. plus if she does do all the work i will have to do all the dishes

i need to learn how to cook

i hate hearing hampters in the middle of the nights

stupid dog is going to sleep in addys room from now on..fucking barked

shannon yawns really lowdly when she is tired she can sleep on the couch from now on :P

anyway im off

it is fathers day

2009-06-21T14:13:00.000-07:00

so its fathersday. the day where we are supposed to show love and respcet our dads. and with me i am 100% cool with doing this with my father.

i love giving him presents and showing him love. but i have been having a thought the past couple of days leading up to fathers day. there are really some dads in this world who do not deserve to get presents or get wished happy fathers day. i know this sounds really harsh right now but it is true. i mean i have friends who have fathers who they have not seen sence they were 14. or fathers who all around are not good people. now im not talking simply about one friend who has a dad who it apears made some bad choices in his father daughter realationship. what i am talking about is the men who are not fathers..in the sence of the word.

father:a man who exercises paternal care over other persons; paternal protector or provider.

so if your abusing and abandoning your kids. im sorry but in my mind that does not make you a father. if your being manipulative and lacking love you are not a father. if you are pushing your kids aside for your own benifite. once again you are not a father.

just because some man was too stupid to wear a condom. or some women was not smart enough to use birth control that does not make you a parent. that makes you an idiot. a parent is exsiactly what is says in the defition of father (without the male part) someone who is loving, and cares for you. not someone who is making your life more difficult. or someone who makes you struggle.

i know for me i am spoiled in alot of ways in my life. and the fact that i was born into such a loving family with parents who actually know what it means to be parents who actually care for me and look after me is one of them. parents who strive to make my life easier instead of more difficult. now one of the reasons for this i think may be partly because my father himself did not have the best father. and he is constintly struggling to make sure he does not make the same mistakes that his father did and that he is always here for us and to provide us with a loving inviroment. even though both of his kids could no longer be considered kids but instead are considered adults.

and yet as i write this another thought comes into my mind. it is the quote that goes something like you cant choose your family but you can choose your friends. this quote makes me thankful of that fact.

and then once again i place in here a definition. family:a group of people who are generally not blood relations but who share common attitudes, interests, or goals and, frequently, live together.

that to me sounds like my friends. and i know for a fact that certain friends i actually do call my little sister and such. you i do fully consider family. i do wish you to know that ill be here to look out for you. that you are family.

maybe we can chose our family..maybe the quote is wrong. because that definition really makes all my friends sound like family. i would not choose to be around people i dont like.

i know im going off track with this topic. but what i think i am mainly trying to get across in this blog post is simply this. for thoes of you who do have a loving father and a good family. please do your best to show your dad that you love him today. because if he is anything like my father he deserves it. and he probably worked really hard to give you the good life that you have and to support you.
and for thoes friends of mine who dont have such a good family life or a good relationship with there father. i openly consider you my family. i would not have made you my friends other wise. because it is not just the family that you live with but the family that you choose who shape you. who make you who you are. and who you should thank every once and a while. so to thoes friends happy fathers day. you have been great to me and if we are going by the definition of father which is careing and protective you have all been fathers.(yes females can be fathers too). and i hope that some of you can see me in the same light too. but if not. all i can say is that im here for you and that i love you.

best wishes

happy fathers day <3

love love love <3

2009-06-17T00:05:00.000-07:00

i lack creatvity. no thats not right. i lack creativity right now. its late. and i dont feel like writing a poem or anything of the sort. but i wish to put something beautiful on here. something expressing love. and so i thought i would put one of my all time favorite love songs on here. off here are they lyrics. the song is "the rain song" by led zeppelin:

This is the springtime of my loving - the second season I am to know
You are the sunlight in my growing - so little warmth I've felt before.
It isn't hard to feel me glowing - I watched the fire that grew so low.

It is the summer of my smiles - flee from me Keepers of the Gloom.
Speak to me only with your eyes. It is to you I give this tune.
Ain't so hard to recognize - These things are clear to all from
time to time.

Talk Talk - I've felt the coldness of my winter
I never thought it would ever go. I cursed the gloom that set upon us...
But I know that I love you so

These are the seasons of emotion and like the winds they rise and fall
This is the wonder of devotion - I see the torch we all must hold.
This is the mystery of the quotient - Upon us all a little rain must fall.

2009-06-14T21:57:00.000-07:00

urge to go on rant growing. this is not going to come out how i want it to sound. i can say that right now but here is my attempt.

so before i start on a blog/rant here is a definition of beauty that i found in a dictonary:

the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations (as shape, color, sound, etc.), a meaningful design or pattern, or something else (as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest).

so in this definition i dont see any specific example of what someone should look like to be considered beautiful. it just says that it should bring satifaction to the mind. so tha screams to me the whole saying that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
why is it that we are going by magazines idea of beauty why is it that we can look at one person

and consider them beautiful because of traits that are common with societys standards but not common in real women who have actual lives. women who are not constintly in the media. women who have a life and are beautiful all the same.

like i said why is one immage considered beautiful and not another.

im tired of hearing girls compare themselfs to others. saying i whish i had her legs or her hair or her boobs (yes i know i am guilty of doing some of this myself) but why are we only looking at the one definition of beauty. why are we only looking ath the physical. in the definition that i first said at the begining of this blog it clearly said "as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest". personality. that is a big thing too. i mean you can take the most beautiful girl in the world (whatever that might look like in your mind) but if she is a bitch. she is ugly as fuck.... on a note similar note to this that my dad has said to me is "thoes really good looking bitchy girls are fun for a while. but then you grow up and you realize that you would rather be with someone who you actually like to spend time with. someone who you relate to. there are two types of girls. the kind that are only good for one thing. and the kind that you actually want to bring home to your family".

now my turn. just becasue a guy you like does not notise you...or does not want in your pants. does not mean you are not good looking. this does not mean jack shit. especially if you are still in high school. it may be the guy who is an egotistical jerk (this goes both way).

to many girls start to judge there looks based on how men (or women depending what they are into) treat them. and im sorry but im just going to say this ...THATS FUCKING RETARTED. stop putting yourself down

stop needing a man to justify to yourself that you look good

stop reading fashion magazines unless you are grown up enough to realize how fake the women in thoes magazines really are (dud i mean have you ever seen how fucking skinny and stupid thoes women look)

we all have our fat days. this i know. i mean even i have fat days and im one of the thinists chicks in my group of friends. but it is one thing to have a fat day and to actually put yourself down. to dig yourself in a whole. please laddies and men(i know this blog post is mainly directed towards girls sorry). you dont need to do that.

open your eyes and see that you are beautiful. especially all the girls that i know. even the ones that i dont get along with that well (not bad pesonalities. just sometimes people just dont get along for some reasons)

men all this goes for you too. you dont need to be super tall, you dont need to have the rocken six pack. and honestly you dont need to brag about having a big penis or anything along that.

when will people open their eyes.

you are beautiful!!!

2009-06-13T11:46:00.000-07:00

things on my mind:

-house sitting soon. going to be so much fun, going to have freedom. going to get owned by addy several times. going to miss my bed, going to miss my shower. going to miss my record player. going to have so much fun but am also going to enjoy comming home at the end of it

- ahhhh why does my dad insist on waking me up early for pancakes. i love the food and i love that he is doing something for me and being all around awesome but sometimes all a girl wants is to sleep in

- working with red head again to today. hopefully it wont be so bad. hopeing. she does bitch about everyone at the store and slack at work and bugs the crap out of me. luckaly i am working at the kiosk today so i wont have to work with her much.

- yesterday was fun. bbq was good. tackling boyfriend was fun but in the long run was a stupid idea. i think i pulled a muscel in my leg and now it hurts to walk. work is going to be fun with a sore leg. today is going to be a long day because

***********

- how pissed i was when i thought thsi all got deleted right before i actually went to work then how happy i was right now at karens seeing that it did not get deleted

- why are words like fuck considered bad intoday society. and why do we seem to have to say the so called bad words before we figure out that they are bad.

-penis penis penis penis...im imature. but yes that word is always on my mind

- i lost my random train of thought

- there is a sexy women sitting behind me with messy hair and a hoddy thats too big for her...thats hot

2009-06-08T11:49:00.000-07:00

this happens every year. i get exsited for my birthday leading up to it but then the closer i get to the actual date the more i want to freez time and not have my birthday at all. the more i start to wish i could fly and go to neverland (although in the original story girls did not go to never land but whatever).

its not that i dont wanna grow up because i fear the responsibility that comes with getting older. its just some of the changes that happen. i donno. i used to find the idea of giving myself a birthday party lots of fun. but now i just dont want to acknolage the fact that i am getting older. its weird cause even though i do not look it at all. i am one of maybe the second oldest person in our little group of friends.

ahhh stupid birthdays

*******

im tired from working full time now. seems like already somedays the only thing that keeps me going at work is the thoughts of the fun things i get to do when i am no longer at work such as chillen with friends, going to a green day concert (i should really listen to the cd more before i go there i realy dont like being at a concert when i dont know the lyrics. it bugs me). and then cali with fiona. i just keep telling myself over and over these are the reasons why i am at work. to get money to go on these fun adventures

*********

i am not practising driving standard as much as i should be. i mean there is a pretty car sitting in my garage just for me. and if i learn how to drive properly and i get my full licence then it is all mine. to drive and to look cool and awesome. but part of me does not want the pretty car. even thought i told all my friends that i have it. part of me wants to just keep my beater car. it has peronality i tell myself. i dont know why i keep procrastinating on stuff but i do. and the whole driver licence. pretty car thing does not seem as big of a deal to me as it did about 3 weeks ago. im more into hanging with friends and continually attmepting to find time to just chill with my boyfrend rather then rushing off to get my licence....even thought there is a little voice (and both of my parents) that are telling me i should do that.

******

i was bored with shannon yesterday so when my mom was cooking we just started narating what she was doing and were calling it lindas cooking show. she joined in. and took a big swig of here beer. said it was to keep the cook calm

******

aggg im off to work now. i dont wanna go. i have to work with the red head for 8 hours today. shoot me now

2009-06-04T10:12:00.000-07:00

omg yay so i have officially boughten my ticket to go to san fran with fiona. i am soooo happy. it is going to be an adventure. i have wanted to get off the island for so long and this summer it is actually going to happen which makes me happy. now dont get me wrong the little island that i live on can be great. but being stuck here year after year sometimes can be enough to make somone want to find a good bludgening object and smack themself right in the head. but no worries about me doing that this year :P cause i have a tickit to get out of here. oh man fiona and i started blasting the song if your going to san fransisco after we bought our tickits. its officially going to be our song. ims exsited about our adventure.

the plan is that on the 19th of august we are going to leave for seattle becasue it is cheaper to fly from seattle then it is to fly from here. that night we are going to pay to stay somewere in seattle. and the next morning on the 20th we are going to head to the airport and get on our plan and go to san fran. (yaaaaay). we should be spending about 3 days in san fran just being totaly hippies. checking out the cool shops. we might go to the prision that is there. just cause we want to go visit alcatras (sp?) the old cool prision. that would be neat. then after a couple days in san fran we are going to make our way down to los angelos and go to some amusment parks. you know california advenutre, knotts berry farm, hollywod studios all that crap. it really depends on how much money that we have and how much we really wanna see. maybe go to disney land.

then we head back to san fran and hang there till the 3rd of september which is when we fly back to seattle. so we will probs be back on the island by the 4th at the latest. which gives me lots of times considering i dont think that schoool starts till the 7th of september. but yes this augest is going to be sooo awesome. fiona already put a down payment on a hostel for the first three nights that we are there. it is about 30 bucks a night to stay there. and it should be a party. i still need to go and get travelers insurance. we are planning on buying a california rail pass because there is a train that leaves from san fran and goes to all the destinations that we wish to go and see. so this should be fun

oh and im going camping with chris and a bunch of other peoples in august also. that is happening on the tenth. and going till the 17th at the very latests. which means i will luckaly have the 18th to pack before fiona and i go off on our epic california adventure.

man its hot here im going to burn in cali
or come back with a wickid tan
my parents are worried cause i all ready look like a hippy. my moms words were "i fear, all the stuff that your going to bring back with you from san fransisco with you"

i just laughed i like looking like a hippy. this adventure should be fun.

i still need to talk to my boss about getting august off. i should do that soon.

i loves adventures

2009-06-01T18:52:00.000-07:00

dear annoying red head coworker:

dear annoying red head coworker please learn not take everything so personally. when im asking you to move a little quicker and go on your break its not becasue i think your working slow its becasue i want you to go and finish your break so i can go home and not have to stay late like i had to tonight.

it would be nice if you would listen to me. i know your in your fifties and im just turning twenty but i have been working here longer then you. i know what im doing. i am not trying to boss you around im just trying to get the job done. you dont have to always double check everything that i say with the manager. it annoys me and im sure that it annoys her as well.

it would be nice if you learned to sighn the sheet and fill out forms and do other jobs that you seem to like to pass onto me just becasue you do not wanna do it. its not fair. im usually already working on something then i have to run over and do whatever it is that you should be doing. this is espically annoying on closing shifts becasue i know that even though you should be doing something, if i do not do it then i know for a fact we will not get out on time and i do not want to be staying late becasue of you.

please be a little more focused, your not new, if you were i would have a bit more sympathy. stop running to me there are other people to ask questions.
thank you.

i know my coworker is never going to read that but i just really needed to vent. today was along day at work. there was all that. and then when i did get off work today. i got off late. and then when i tryed to swipe my pass to get out of the parking lot the gate would not go up. five minutes later it did...and was stuck up. wow today was not my day. frustrating. yesterday was better. i swam for three hours.

i miss the lake already.

oh on a funny note. today at work a guy game in and on his right earlobe he had three peircings. and no pericings on his left. the thought that went through my head that i was tempted to ask but i did not was

so does that mean that your triple gay?

2009-05-26T22:06:00.000-07:00

random thoughts in my head well at work:

-who the hell spends 200 dollers at a gift shop? this stuff is over priced crap.

- why do i show compasion for things that creep me out...like spiders. i mean they are ugly but that does not mean that they should be killed. what makes our lifes so much more valuable then theirs? just because they are bugs. i used to kill spieders till i read a phantom book. erik considered himself ugly like a spider and got really angry about them getting killed. after reading that book i stoped killing spiders i would put them outside. then i heard somewere that when you put house spiders outsied they usualy die because they are not used to being ouside. that made me sad so i no longer put house spieders out side. ill see one running across the floor and just aviod it. or ill try to put them on house plans and such in hope that they will kill the annoying flys.

- is it okay do do one really bad thing for the greater good of the human race. would you be able to shoot one of your pest friend in the head if doing so brought about world peace? would you be able to let your best friend shoot you in the head if doing so brought about world peace?

- i find it funny that they used to consider left handed people spawns of satan considering im left handed and i feel guilty even if i kill a spider?

- what would humans be like if we were actually a sexual? did not need love in order to mate. did not need a partner.

- why do really fundametalist christains want everyone to be christain? i know they think it would be better and there souls would be saved and all that jazz. but in all honesty if every one was the same it would be lame. i would miss the world being so culturaly diverse. i would miss people being different in their own little way. if everyone was christain or if everyone was some kind of religion this world would be sooo bery boring.

- all differnt kinds of people get ranted about. the hippies, the emos, the freaks, the gays, the punks, the christains, any one who is considered not the norm...well the majority of my friends and me fit into thoes categories and i think they are better and more loyal people then that the leaders of social conformity chose to belive.

i know i had other thoughts well randomly pricing crap and putting it out today but i cannot remember what all of them were.

what goes down, must come up..you know like a trampoline

2009-05-22T21:32:00.000-07:00

this summer is looking good to me. im exsited im thinking its going to be a good un. okay so at first my summer started out really crapy for a number of reasons.

1) my grandma died. this really sucked, and yes that is an understatment. it made not only me emo, but also my entire family...i saw my dad cry...that was not normal for me

2) i was running low on money cause i spend all my money on my firends

3) i was feeling left out of some fun things becasue i have to work full time

4) i heard from my dad that i could not go to the green day concert because tickets whent on sale the day of my grandmas funeral and obviously we are not bailing out of a funeral so that we can go and get tickets for a concert. ahhh they sold out

but you know. i think i am really starting to belive in karma. the fact that when bad things happen to you something good has to be just around the courner. becasue things are starting to look good

first of.
1) i do get to go to the green day concert. becasue my dad found tickets and it is going to be friken awesome. i saw them when they game to vancouver in 2005 and i cant wait to see them again

2) i has more money. well not yet but my grandma has left me a good deal of money in her will. im not going to say how much becasue my friends already know and i dont wanna be like omg guys look how much i have on the internet. but i get the money officialy on monday. this means i can save for important things like downpayments on an apartment and such for when i want to move out. and also addy this means i can spend more money on you, dont argue bitch im doing it!!!

3) i have trips and adventures planed this summer. chris wants to go up to parksville again and bring me...that should be fun. the funny thing was that this whole dicesion was made through a text message conversation...in old english. that fair prince christopher is wise beyond his years. also im going to san fran in august with fiona, we are going to dress up like hippies. but i have also come to the conclusion that if she does not have enough money to go after all im not going to worry becasue i can go and have an adventure by myself. i hope to have her come, or have a friend come if she cant. but i am not going to be stuck on the rock this summer like last summer. if no one can come with me im going to be the lone hippy back backing in sanfran

so yes. adventures money and concerts. what more could a girl ask for. i still wanna go camping sometime this summer so i might have to sort that out. lizzard lake is a fun place. my parents used to take me there. i should get some directions and i could go there again.

2009-05-22T11:56:00.000-07:00

due to supidity the last blog post was removed :P

new blog post to be, posted when i have more time but as for now i have to run of to work and get a lecture from my boss and try to deal with grumpy customers. oh and by the way

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATTHEW!!!!!!!!!!! <3

2009-05-17T10:40:00.001-07:00

so i was saying to addy that i usualy dont post a blog unless i feel like i have something important about me to say, or just have something to say. this is because i find my old blog posts embarasssing. addy gave me this kinda well then look. and iv been thinking i should just do a random not so important blog. or at least attempt. so my idea is im going to write down a list of things that people probs dont know about me. this is going to be hard considering im really open and close with all my friends but here is my attempt.

thing you probably dont know about me

1) even though my dad had a tough life as a teenager and i know i shouldent. sometimes i envy him because of his stories, his adventures and the era that he grew up in. his era had the best music, and my life sometimes feels way to tame compared to his.

2) most of you know that i really wanna go on an adventure, that i wanna get out of sidney. and for a while that i have been really into the idea of going to scotland but. i have come to the conclusion that the only reason why i wanted to go there was becasue it was the first place that poped into my mind that would be a good place to go to, to get the fuck out of sidney. i dont know what was really special about scotland for me...now it just seems like a random place

3) when my friends are emo and i cant make them feel better in some form i start to feel traped. i wonder if im being a good enough friend, if im trying hard enough. it especially sucks for me when i have a no intellegent response when they are ranting to me about what is going on. this is hard for me because me being on of the older people in my group of friends i feel like i should be the one with good feed back. i should have life experience that can help. i feel my life is too easy compared to others and its not fair. if i had to have a miserable year just so you could have one more hour of happieness i would!

4) the first time i got in trouble at school was elementry school. it was kindergarden. i got sent to the corner because i pinned a boy under a table and kissed him. this thought makes me laugh now and im kinda thinking it explains some of my now/ later in life behaviour.

5) i had one really close friend in elementry school who was friends with me despite the fact that others would call me names and bully me. his name was dylan e (i know his but just incase i do meet him again, he might find it weird that i posted his name on the interwebs or something so im just using the inital). he moved away at the end of grade five. i still wonder where he is, and what he is doing. i occasionally facebook him hoping i will find a profile. he was a good friend even though it was only elementry school..and i miss him.

6) i watch shows like south park, and family guy, and seinfeld and now i like them and find them funny. but i originally just started watching them becasue my brother watched them. it was a way for me to hang out with him. considering there was a time in our lives when i was just the stupid younger sister who he did not wanna have anything to do with. this was a good way for me to push into his life.

7) i went through phases when i wanted to be different things when "i grew up". vet, archeologist, artist and teacher. i gave up vet because i could not bear the idea of having to put down an animal. im too sensitive i even cry when an animal dies in a movie. i gave up archeologist because i fail at math. and there is a great deal of math needed in that proffession, although i still find anthropology and archeology really interesting. i gave up being an artist because i cant draw worth crap, i only wanted to be this for a little while in elementry school anyway. i still wanna be a teacher, preschool teacher. i hope i never give this one up.

8) when i was a kid i loved to wash dishes, i would pretend that the cups i were washing were boats and would have lots of fun. occasionally when im asked to wash dishes i will still have fun doing it becasue the little kid in me comes out, although working at tim hortons for nine months kinda killed that a bit.

9) the tips of my fingers look kinda gross, this is because partly out of habbit i pick at them. i do this when im bored, worried, nervous or exsited. its a bad habbit which im trying to break.

10) for the longest time in my life i was always the pretty girls friend. it was not very often that i would be the one who guys would look at first. now at this period in my life that i do seem to be getting more attention, i find it kinda weird. im not used to it. even though i wont say it outloud when someone says im beautiful..in my head im sometimes thinking..are you sure?

yep these are ten things that you probably dont know about me. i thinks it would be cool if thoes friends who read this blog posted something similar. you dont have to, i know it gets annoying when people turn things like this into stupid forwards but whatever.

11) i never know how to end a blog properly without it sounding to me like i just eneded it in the middle of a thought. how does one end a blog post properly?

2009-05-11T23:34:00.000-07:00

this week for me has definitly been filled with its ups and its downs. i had to go to a funeral and then a wedding the next day. and i feel kinda bad that i bailed out of the second half of the wedding. this was because of some drama and other shit that i had on my mind that day and i realy could not stand being around a buch of people. i know that makes me kinda sound like a jerk but i could not do it. i had to get away from the giant groups of people and just going to my group of friends. my little serious coffee group. i swear we are almost becoming like a self help group. once a week we gather at sc, get some food or something to drink and just sit there, and talk. i mean we talk about everything. sometimes its retarted stuff, full out immature talks about sex and dumb penis jokes. but other times we seem to get into deeper conversations about the big things like life, love and faith. we talk about who we are what we want to do with our lives and wear we want to go. i know that group has had so much drama in it over the time. and there are people who dont like going sometimes or who have just stoped going altogether. i mean i have had feeling of not wanting to go and hang with the group sometimes. but then there are the times when i feel like i need them. these are some of the main people who support me in my life. and it amazing how long it took for me to notice how important these people are to me, and how lucky i am to have all of them as friends. (wow this is getting sappy).

there are so many examples that i could list of how they are great and how they support me and have helped me at certain times. but i would there would have to be a blog entrie for each person to go into enough detail. so the one person that i am going to use in this example is chris (yep thats right christopher you get a blog mention, yay!!). so saturday i was not having a good day, weird drama shit occured with one of my friends, that even know i have sorta talked out with this person but we have not quite settled it. partly because im not fully ready to rant to them. any way because of all this shit that was going on in my mind i skiped out on the second half of one of my really good friends sarahs wedding. i know thats going to come back to kick me in the but. sent her an e-mail trying to explain and apologise but she is newly married and probs to busy to check e-mail. anyway chris could tell that i was not ....happy to say the least. and i talked with him for a bit then he asked me to go for a walk. this is one of the things that i love about chris (yes this can be a gundam point). his ability to make little offers like going for a walk and talking but yet in the end, you gain a great deal out of them. he is one of thoes friends where it is clear that he does truly care and he does want you to be happy. not just because he him self does not wanna be around emo people (if that were the case he could just go home) but because he does not like seeing his friends in that state. or at least thats the way i get it. he has this great power to actualy listen to a friend in need, which can seem like a simple thing but it is surprising how many friends even though they may not be talking are not actually listening.

anyway he made me feel way better. and after that talk my week seemed to just go upwards from then. i started to reflect on my grandmas funeral more. i did it alot. it was actually quite cool for a funeral. let me put it this way. my grandma graduated from nursing school in 1952. there were about maybe only 30 people who graduated that year including her. 7 of these people from that school came to her funeral. on of them was her roomate of 2 years. i found that really cool. i found it neat that after all these years these people who went to school toghether who were in their own little group were still hanging out, comming together it was really cool to see them. made me wonder if i am the one to die first in my little group of friends how many of the sc group will come to my funeral? will they have interesting stories to tell about me? have i left any kind of decent mark on my friends..that has impacted there life on a meaningful level..all the penis jokes aside. its funny right now i can picture karen yelling at me saying something like "fuck yes you impacted me laura" then going on a huge speal..yet still i wonder.

my dad said something pretty awesome at my grandmas funeral that i have also been replaying. my grandma had a water closet apperently were people would just write up quotes..she contributed to alot of them, quotes that she really liked. quotes would always get replaced..drawn over by new ones. it was not often that just one would stay there. there was one quote that my dad said that did stay writen up for a really long time. anyway this is what he said at the funeral (taken from his notes that i found on the compy)

"

"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and
the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to
find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a
healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know
even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to
have succeeded."

-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Mom, your life was a success, and I love you."

this quote touched me..hearing the stories of my grandma touched me she did everything in this quote from what people said at her funeral. she accomplished so much. and i cant help but wonder have i been succeding in life? or could i try just a little bit harder?

2009-05-02T15:12:00.000-07:00

know what i hate that feeling of being emo. know what i hate even more that feeling of being emo when you feel like there is no reason for it, or when there is a reason for it but you just dont think its a good enough reason. i donno. so yesterday well i was driving to work i saw that my dad was calling me. i though you know that is odd so i pulled over and i took the call. my dad was calling me to let me know that my grandma had died. and that i could still go to work if i wanted to but that he was going into victoria to talk to people and get things sorted out after this. for the first couple of minutes i just sat in my car and cryed. i cryed. for my grandma. i mean i know she has been slowly faiding for a while, i should be expecting it. but as i was crying i was not really crying over the old lady who i saw slowly faiding in a wheel chair for half of my life. the women who forgot who i was, and desperatly got confused when we had her over for dinner. no i was crying for the women that she was. i cryed for the grandma who used to take me and my brother to the park, and too the petting zoo. the women who would have us over for sleepovers and who would always have goodies in her cubord. the women who looked out for us.

i remember one time when it was winter, it was the blizzard of 96 so there was alot of snow, i must have been 7. and anyway my dad drove us to victoria in his 4 by 4 truck with a sled. and we went to this really steap hill that was right by my grandmas house. my brother who was 9 at the time sat at the front of the sled and i sat at the back. well going down we crashed into something and i went flying off the sled over my brother and landed face first into the snow. my parents quickly picked me up and tryed to make me feel better but i was still sad. after that we went to my grandmas house and there i was welcomed with warm hot chocolate and the love of my grandma.

its little memories that is how i like to remember her, that is what i cryed over. the fact that that loving caring women was gone from my life. after getting out of work i went home yesterday and emo'd out for a while. then i just got this feeling of wanting to run, run out of the house. go somewere else do something house just not have to think about the sadness, and just be distracted. so i went and hung out with stephan and other friends. i made jokes and did my usual silly stuff well still thinking of my grandma. i was also a jerk....yesterday well trying to distract myself from the sadness of the day, trying to get comfort from thoes around me well without thinking about it excluding the one of the main people who i should have talked to, who i should have let comfort me. but for somereason was the one person i did not go to. and that is what makes me a jerk..... im not going to go into to much more detail about that because that person and i still need to talk i thinks, and posting everything on the internet is not a smooth or elegent way to deal with it.

but anyway after a whole day of trying to be happy, around my friends and just wanting to be out of the house near the end before i went home. the sadness started to sink in, with full force. .i got sad over stuff i did, and over my grandma being gone. so i went home. i went home and read poetry. and then today when i woke up i read poetry. i still feel emo a bit, and i dont know if i wanna go out with my friends like i said i would, but i dont want to just sit here tonight, i kinda wanna spend one on one time with someone, but part of me is hopeing that i dont have to make the effort to grab the phone and have to call someone and say hey lets go out. im hopeing that someone will call me, and be like hey laura lets go do something just you and i ill pay this time. a friend saying i know your sad but dont worry ill look after you. i dont mean to sound like a jerk who only does things hopeing it will come back and someone will do something for me. but when my friends are sad i know i have gone and picked them up and payed for stuff for them and taken them out and done stuff...bought flowers bought dinner, and i know this has not always made them feel better but i did it.

and i have yet to have someone do that for me. wow this post is way to emo for me. now my parents just ruiend my train of though by telling me to go walk the dog...so i should go do that. but before i do i wanna post one poem that i read this morning that made me feel a bit better.

I Think Continually Of Those Who Were Truly Great
Stephen Spender

I think continually of those who were truly great.
Who, from the womb, remembered the soul's history
Through corridors of light where the hours are suns
Endless and singing. Whose lovely ambition
Was that their lips, still touched with fire,
Should tell of the Spirit clothed from head to foot in song.
And who hoarded from the Spring branches
The desires falling across their bodies like blossoms.

What is precious is never to forget
The essential delight of the blood drawn from ageless springs
Breaking through rocks in worlds before our earth.
Never to deny its pleasure in the morning simple light
Nor its grave evening demand for love.
Never to allow gradually the traffic to smother
With noise and fog the flowering of the spirit.

Near the snow, near the sun, in the highest fields
See how these names are fŠted by the waving grass
And by the streamers of white cloud
And whispers of wind in the listening sky.
The names of those who in their lives fought for life
Who wore at their hearts the fire's center.
Born of the sun they traveled a short while towards the sun,
And left the vivid air signed with their honor.

2009-04-26T17:21:00.001-07:00

so im losing money. i realize i spend way to much money. not all at once, but a little bit at a time. the thing is when you hear this you instantly think oh thats not good. oh thats bad. but i have come to realize that losing all this money is making me happy. well not the fact that the money is going it self but the reason why it is going. all my money is dissapearing becasue i am spending it on friends. im funny that way yes i spend money carlessly i guess but it is never careless on my self. here is an example of this.

me in a store: "hmm i really want this thing for myself but even though it is only 8 bucks i should not spend the money"

ten minutes later me in different or exsact same store: " omg look at this it would be perfect for (insert friend) it may be 50 bucks but i absolutly have to get it for this person, they will love it".

im bad a saving money when it comes to myself but i love spending money on my friends. weather its paying for dinner for some friends who them selfs are saving up money for school or cant afford it (chris, fiona, addy). or seeing some gift that i have to get for someone (karen, chris, shannon, addy, fiona. any friend actually all depends on what i see in the store). i did that today actually. i went out with my friend brynn and i bought 6 things, only two of thoes things were for me.

what i bought was :

sandals: for me i needed thoughs i have a pair but they are going to break soon...i can tell.

3 buttons: one of them was for me i thought it was funny. another one was for addy i think she will laugh when se sees it although i dont know if she will actually wear it but it will make her laugh and make her happy that is all that matters. and the last one i got for karen. i figured she would love it and wear it. and it will make her happy i actually called her right after i bought it just so that she would be happy. i love making people happy.

1 water gun: well brynn bought one also. i was originally planning on buying this...he he he brynn and i are making evil plans so it is needed.

1 potted sun flower: this was for my mom. i saw it when brynn was buying flowers for his mom for her birthday and i had to buy it. my mom loves sun flowers and i knew it would make her happy and she would love it for her garden. let me put it this way. my mom loves sun flowers so much that when we were in france my mom snuck into a feild and stole someones sunflower. my dad got annoyed and said linda you cant do that, so my mom being emo droped the flower and felt guilty for the rest of the night...to spite my dad when we got home she bought a fake plastic one and stuck it in the lawn and was like "there george...now i have my own friken sun flower that i did not steal" he loled. well now that my mom has a proper garden, i bought her a real sun flower.

yes i like making people happy,....that is why im poorish. oh and for anyone who is going to comment and say oh zeppelinphan stop spending money on me, you dont have to do that, save your money. im just warning you. if im in a store and see something thats like omg i know someone who would love that... there is a 90% chance that im still going to buy it and still be short money. i just cant help it. im poor because i care, im poor becasue im compulsive. im poor because i want my friends to have what they like, because every one deserves to get random presents just for the sake of getting a present. not because of birthdays, or anniversaries, or whatever. its nice to just get random presents.

**************************************************************************************
(stars are my very obviouse subject change)

random off note i have to say something funny that happend today before i went out with brynn and went shopping.

so i had laundry on the line to dry instead of using the dryer becasue it was a nice sunny day out.

anyway my mom wanted to put her stuff on the line so she asked me to take mine off. and this is the conversation . (keep in mind it started with her talking to me not my dad)

mom: "grab your underwear and seee if its dry so you can take it off and ill put mine up" (again talking to me about my laundry)

my dad gets out of his chair and walkes up to my mom

puts hand jokivly down his pants ,dad: "well i could take it off. but its a little bit wet i think thats cause i peed a little"

me: rofl..omg dad..lolololol

mom: omg go away, why do you always do this to me

me: "dad you have done this to mom before?"

dad: *just smilles and laughs*

mom: *jokative tone* "i hate you guys*...she says this with a smille on her face

....i love my family

2009-04-22T23:31:00.000-07:00

so even thougt its not for about two months. and nobody has to get me anything for my birthday. but if for somereason some of my friends out there really feel an urge to spend money on me i direct you to this link.

http://woodstocktradeco.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=CTGY&Store_Code=W DSTK&Category_Code=ZEPALL

anything from here would make me more then happy

ya im a phan

2009-04-15T00:12:00.001-07:00

as most of my friends now i am a huge phantom of the opera fan. and if your not my friend and your reading this im pretty sure it would be easy to figure out by my first coupld very embarassing immature blog posts. any way i have alot of phantom things: i have about 3 copies of the gaston leroux book becasue they are all different translation, i have a piano book, i have two coppies of the susan kay book one is hard cover and one is not, i have a pamflit from when i went a saw the play, i have one book called the journey of the mask (bad published fan fiction), i have a plushy phantom doll the my friend amy made for me, i have a drawing of christine and erik that my awesome friend karen for me, the cd with the music, two books that with the 2004 movie scriped and the actual play scriped that containe detail about the actors and the stage and all that other stuff. i have the 1925 movie version, the 2004 musical version, and on its way becasue i oredered it off of amazon a 1990 mini series version. needless to say i am obseesed i have alot of crap. the sad thing is that this is not my only obsession there is also led zeppelin which im not even going to go into all the led zeppelin stuff that i have.

any way i love phantom of the opera i love the idea of the anti hero. they guy who fights soo hard for something. even thought all the shit that he has been in his life. and unfortanitly in this story it does not end out so well. im not going to go into great detail incase there are some people here reading this who have not read the orginal book , which i highly recoment you do read. might be hard to get into at first but is great. this story is a love hate realationship for me. i love the phantom. i see him as amazing well you know for a crazy girl kidnapping psyco. i guess i find myself defending him saying look at his life look what he went through. he is not fully crazy he is in love and does not know how to express it. i mean look at how socioty has treated him. rideculed him shut him down, pushed him aside his entire life. tried to kill him. screamed and fanted because of the way he looks. i mean in one of the books that i read his own mother wanted to kill him, did not want to look after him because he was apperently so ugly that when born he looked like death and she did not want to deal with it. its sad. but erik is so cool.

i hate the raoul character this is a character who i see gets everything handed to him. does not work for anything cause he comes from a ritch family. he has the good looks. and he also wants the girl that erik(the phantom) is inlove with. i donno maybe this character just fucks with my morals. i see erik who struggled for everything thoughout his life had so many people hate him. and he has a chance for love with christine and then this stupid pretty boy fop comes in and just snaggs her away. i know there are other fans that will dissagree and say that no christine never loved erik or that raoul was ment to be with her. that i do not agree with. i mean there are some versions where i can actually respect that character like the 1990 kopit version which is on its way. but yes raould seems like someone who does not work. just gets. i think thats why strongly dislike this character.

then there is christine with her i donno. i wanna hate her but i cant. i think i really wanna dislike her because i like erik. i wanna yell at her and call her a wossy for leaving erik, for taking the easy way out which is raoul. when deep down inside she really loves erik and she just wants to be with him but instead she goes with the stupid fop for security. thats what i wanna say. i think thats what i tell myself in this story that makes me dislike her. but in reality which of us would chose to stay underground with a mad muscian? i mean i tell my self as an obseesed fan that i would stay with erik i love erik. but inreality no way. all girls would go for the comfort. sorry erik. as a fan it hurts me to say this...but you will still never hear me say that christine loves raoul more. cause that is simply not so. in my mind raoul may have won christine, but erik won her heart. and once you have won that in someone there is not going back!

anyway yes i love this story. this blog went a compleatly different direction then what i wanted but whatever. basically im trying to explain what i love so much about this story and about the characters and that is not even all the ones that i could go on a rant....dont even get me started on charlotta, or the managers omg. lol.

so i think i will end this blog with a quote from the kopit movie that i love:

`For as long as I can remember, I have dreamed one sweet dream only. And though that sweet dream came in countless shapes and guises, it was what sustained me. I now know it was of her that I dreamed. I was born to live down here. But till now, I have never known quite why. Well, I was born so she could come and save me! For that is what she's done. She is the reason I was born. You seem startled. Did you think me incapable of such emotion? Well, it seems I'm not. What an astounding discover! Makes everything I've been through worth the waiting and the pain. What pain? The pain was a dream. All was a dream till this. When the gods give you a gift like that, you do not send it back. I love her, Gerard. And I believe, with any luck, in time, she will learn to love me. The gods would be cruel indeed to have sent her otherwise.``-erik(phantom)

2009-04-05T19:25:00.000-07:00

*YAWN*

im tired...i had a fun but long weekend. lets start with friday, i know not the weekend but it counts. so friday usual stuff. wake up at 4:30am in the morning and go to work. work actually went by fast that day. seeing how it was busy and all. after that i went home and wondered around for a bit. normally on fridays after work when i get home i have a shower and i put on my pjs and i just chill for the rest of the day. but this friday i said that i would go and see a movie with friends. well actually the movie was my idea. so instead of getting comfey for and lazing around. i checked my e-mail talked with shannon and addy on msn then went and meet them for dinner. then the 3 of us meet chris and rina and matt at the movie. the movie, one week. really good. i highly recomend it. i love independent movies. for some reason they seem a little bit better then movies with a high budget. i think that, that is partly because independent movie makers are more about the art of the whole thing and the process of the movie. rather then the money. so i after seeing that amazing movie i went home at about 9:40pm and crashed.

on to saturday. yay for waking up at 4:30 am in the morning again. this time worked moved a bit slower becasue i was tired from the long day before. i felt like i was just counting the time hopeing that it would go by faster. then when i did get out i went to the washroom and changed out of my work cloths into some jeans, and my led zeppelin shirt, let my hair down and decided to start driving to mayfair mall. now normally on saturdays i go home and sleep. so i will be more awake to hang with friends that night. but i told friends earlier that i would meet them at the mall. so i hung out at the mall with stephan and addy. which was lots of fun. i bought more converse. i really should stop spending money. i do have enough saved up for car insurance that im going to have to pay in augest and for the road trip that im planing on going on in augest but still.....i spend to much. oh and if your wondering why i did not pass out that day. im just going to say that spencers gift store makes some amazing energy drinks :P.

then that night was sc, and then chilling at chris' place. watching him scream at zombies on a video game. it was fun. then i finaly went home and sleeped. not that well i woke up like 3 times last night. so i wake up today even more tired. then i go and mini golf with matt, and shannon and jon. that was lots of fun. we also went out for a late lunch. and talked about how the meal between dinner and lunch should be called dunch.... it sounds better then linner. i also gave addy my old pair of converse to borrow.

i think its funny i have lent addy my shoes, my belt. and i offered her a shirt. and she bought a led zeppelin shirt. i was jokeing that i was rubbing off at her. saying things like

"im like cancer i spread and there is no cure for me" she lol'd. and then after i said that matt looked at me and was like "you should have told me this before i started dating you". ha ha . oh also.

i bought a gnome today. it was cute and cool and i had to buy it becasue of the i blame it on the gnomes joke that i have with some of my friends. but i had to come home. after karens today instead of hanging out after. not really becasue my parents told me that i should or because i have home work or any obligation. but because im so tired. i need a me day. i feel like im going to fall asleep soon. but its okay.

i had a fun weekend, i hope the rest of you had a good weekend also!!!

im off to put on my pjs. yay comfyness

2009-03-31T22:05:00.000-07:00

so i was surfen the interwebs and i went to bitch magazine.com and as usual there were some good, interesting articles that i enjoyed.

but then i saw one thing that made me laugh. out loud. it was a picture that i thought awsome. so im going to post it here.

thankyou bitch magazine you just made my day.

2009-03-22T22:50:00.000-07:00

so i wanted to write a blog post about sex. not the whole immature teenage me yelling penis a bunch of times and giggling, but not the whole im going to discribe it to you thing either because one i have not had sex so i cannot discribe it. and two when i say i wanna talk about it, write a blog i wanted to discuss how the whole idea of sex has seemed to be considered bad in alot of our socioty. yes i can see how it would be bad to rush into it i guess, if you dont love the person cause there can be that feeling of lonleyness afterwords. but it seems that in todays day and age we still get told what is normal and what is not in this area of our lives.

alot of this appers to come from the church. and other areas. so not to be one of thoes people who goes on a rant saying the chruch is bad. it says we cant do this. it says this is bad. the church is pigion holding us. i will start by saying yes it does appear that way. but being somone who used to go to chruch, and youth group i cant help but attempt to see what they are trying to do. we are not told that we cannot do things by the church because the church wants to hold us down. but because in their eyes they think they are helping us. protecting us. cause i know from all my former church and youth group days the pastor would always say how god was like a father. and trying to protect us. so as a protective father he wants whats best. now im not also trying to go fully to the side of the church im just attmepting to find some sort of middle ground. anyway as god being a father he would only say dont do something becasue in the long wrong it does us harm.

so when the church says something about sex is wrong, or along thoes terms we should not doing this. although i may not agree with them, and dont agree in alot of aspects. i do respect that the main goal of them saying this was not to say your bad, your evil, eww what are you doing. but what to try to keep us heathy and happy and safe in the long run.

but anyway yes so i wanted to to right a blog post about sex and the aspects of it in todays socioty and i thought wow i dont really know if i have that much information myself to write a thoughtfull blog on this so i decided to go and to look stuff up on the internet (yay interwebs). and i ended up reading an article on the web site that i found really interesting. it kinda sums up some of the stuff that i was thinking about and what i wanted to kind of write about. so here is the link.
please read and enjoy.

http://www.radicalleft.net/blog/_archives/2007/7/22/3107594.html

2009-03-13T15:28:00.000-07:00

im just going to say it and put this out there, but you know what. women are really freken annoying. honestly. men, and lesbians i have a question, why are you attracted to us? cause i know for alot of it god knows its not the personality of the overal species. i am a women and i find my own gender so annoying that sometimes i get an urge to blugen somone in the head...maybe thats a little extream. but in fact most of my friends are male, or are tomboys like me. i just cannot stand the girly girl females. the ones that spend countless amounts of money on makeup, and pedicures and all that other bullshit. just feading the montster that socioty created called consumerism. wispering in females ears you need to buy this, or do this or act like this.

my god sometimes it even seems like our gender is dumbing itself down. and i dont get it. i want to scream at some females what the fuck are you doing. not only that but for somereason out species or gender gets joy out of putting men in tough courners. take for example my parents last night.

my dad orders soup.

mom: "oh is it as good as the soup that i make hone"
dad: * clearly stuck in tough situation lie and say yes. or dont lie*......"its better"
mom: *smiles*. see laura you dad knows just what to say.

me interanalty: gnhfidaso;ghisa;hgd;s

so...what your saying. is you know my dad is lieing to you, infact your encouraging it becasue you want to hear that your soup....that you made...is better then some soup that we went out and paid for. do you get joy out of making your man being stuck in that kind of situation, and making him lie to you. or do you just feel like you need to hear it to get some kind of confidence booster? i know bit harsh for me to say but common girls.

put on your big girl panties. we should not need to be constintly begging for compliments, we are stronger then that! we should not have to waist money on make up, and crappy fake nails to feel beautiful, we are already beautiful honestly i dont give a fuck if your 100 pounds ,or 500 pounds its the whole confidence thing that makes you look good.
stop acting stupid. i know some girls just are not that smart same as some guys just dont have their britests moments but one of my biggest pet peaves is when a girl is purposly dumbing herself down just so she can have attention, or fit in more in socioty. i have friends who do that and honestly i have found myself distancing myself from thoes people. because its fucking stupid. you act stupid for attention and then you get all offended becasue people treat you like your stupid and dont know anything. if you want to be talked with instead of talked to, like a little kid. then show us that you can handle that.

read a book for once. follow what happening in the world. join in on conversations. contribute. even if you think you have nothing to say...you probably do.

honestly..sometimes i feel like the whole female group is purposly trying to make themselfs stupid. i mean there are acceptions like my friend karen who is probably one of the smartest people i know, who if she sees anything pink she gets an urge to burn it. and who gets urges to do something manly if you even remotly call her girly. karen is amazing. which is probably why im such good friends with her, among a million other reasons. but sometimes when i am surrounded by thoes girls who just..i donno dont seem to think. dont seem to even try to break the steryo types but are the ones that seem to feed it, and make it bigger.

i just wanna scream and say what the hell. and it really makes me wonder honestly guys and lesbians..and anyone else who is attrackted to females. why are you? what the hell?

makes me wanna get a sex change and be a gay man sometimes because honestly at least then i would not be the same gender as some of thoes girls.

2009-03-06T20:08:00.000-08:00

who watches the watchmen?

i just did. and let me just say as a movie fan. and as a fan of the graphic novel that movie was fucking epic and i would most defnitly see it again.

and omg i saw blue penis. thats right they did not censor out dr manhattans penis, and it was made to look realistic..i saw blue penis on the big screen and i will admit there were times i was not even listeng to dr manhattan in the movie there was the immagutre little fan girl inside me going he he his penis is big....on a big screen and its fucking blue.

i also loved rorscach and not just the character becasue i was inlove with him before i even saw the movie. like i said graphic novel fan girl. i has a rorscach action figure for crying outloud. but i loved the guy who played him i think that he did an amazing job. he he there was a seen where he killed someone in the bathroom and you dont see what happens but he comes out after you hear the toilet flush. and see blood running out of the bathroom. i just might have a sick sence of humor but i found that fucking hilarious. and apperently so did others in the theater casue i heard a fair amount of laughter.

so yes all in all this movie rocked my world an i am going to have buy it as soon as it comes on dvd. i would say im so going to go see it in theaters again and even though i want to considering im grounded i doubt i can convince my parents to unground me for a couple hours again to go and see that amazing movie. im pretty sure they only let me go so they would not be stuck in a house with an emo fan girl for a month. and i know this sounds harsh but when i found out i was grounded i was more emo about not getting to see rorscach on the big screen then the prospect of not seeing my boyfriend.

silly me and my fetish for masked men
phantom.....v for vendetta....and now rorscach

oh and yes almaris i did take my action figure to the movie. and my friend got me a picture of me at the theater by the watchmen poster holding my action figure...ims a dork but thats okay casue dork is the new cool dont you know.

anyway. yes thats me being fangirl exsited. anyway here is a link to an actual movie review if you wanna read it

http://screencrave.com/2009-02-25/the-watchmen-review/

this person does a good job.

anyway...WOOOT WATCHMEN WAS FRIKEN AWSOME

2009-03-03T21:41:00.001-08:00

random thoughts ftw

is there even such a thing as evil. or is that just a word that was created to make situations seem easyier. cause its so much easyier to just call someone evil and blame them for the worlds problems such as osama bin laden, or hitler, then to possibly look at all the peices that might have casused things.. but do you think someone can actually be fully evil? that there is actually posible for that person to not have a single "good" thing about them? to be full of evil like grendel from the story of beauwolf(sp?). i dont know. i think people can do evil things. but i do not belive that someone can fully be absolutly 100% evil.

it makes me wonder. hypotheticaly say someone like hitler ( cause he is such an easy example). was born in a much more loving family then he was, was tought by thoes around him to treat others with kindness, and if he himself was more accepted in his society would he still have turned out the way he did? and if not, then was he himself was not evil? could it be that it was society that created something evil? cause how can someone be born like that.

and then i think that if evil can be created. if little pieces through out someones life can make them like that. then how can we say someone is evil, how can we just point fingures at one person.

is there even such a thing as evil? or was it just simply created so people can be manipulative. "oh him, hes evil"

i donno, its late and this does not make much sence. but its a random thought and i had to write it down somewere before it turned into one of thoes things that seems like a good thought then you forget what it was the next morning.

2009-02-25T21:29:00.000-08:00

this is a story about a girl named zeppelinphan...zp for short cause im lazy and zeppelinphan is too long to write.

one day zp woke up early after a long nigt of waking up every couple of hourse to go and do volunteer work at a day care. zp love volunteering at the day care casue it was normally lots of fun and the shifts when by quickly. but this time the day care was short staffed and it was only zp and the teacher who ran the day care who were able to work. zp ran around alot trying to make sure the kids listend and cleaned up after them selfs. trying to help with lunches well little kids cryed becsue they had to eat vegitables. and well zp helped a little kid open his lunch container he droped a nasty bannana on zp's pants...ewww. after lunch and zp wiping off her pants. zp desided to read a story to the little kids. at first it was good and they were enjoying it. then some arguments started and they started to fight because they could not see the pages. then after that zp got the kids calmed down and took them outside to play. once again at first everything was good. and zp mannaged to relax and just watch the kids play. but then when her head was turned zp heard a thud...and then crying.

one of the kids fell on the pavement and started to cry. ...zp helped this kid up dusted him off and gave him a hug..secretly feeling a bit happy because she had been telling this kid before not to run on the pavement. after that the little kid did not run on the pavement anymore, so falling was a good learning tool. also during that day some little kid eneded up not quite getting to the bathroom on time and accedently peed on zp's hands. which was gross, and there was also a little boy who wanted to pee sitting down so zp had to help hold him so he did not fall into the toilet. it was a full long tireing day. but at least zp still enjoys volunteering even though she got peed on and had somone drop a bannana on her pants.

isent that an inspiring story lol .. i wish i could come up with some kind of moral that makes sence...umm the moral of the story is: dont sighn up for work unless your willing to get peed on and have people drop rotten bannas on your pants.

nope thats not a good moral here is one maybe: though work is tough, and sometimes you expereince rotten, nasty things well at work. as long as your doing something that you enjoy. it will all be worth it in the end. becasue in the long run its better to be doing something you love with the ocasional nasty thing such as a bannana or pee. then to be doing something you hate, like deeling with nasty customers. cause if your doing something you love. then the bannanas and pee wont matter. cause you will feel satisfied and happy with how your day went. well with a job you hate you will wonder why your still even there. and what your doing with your life.

hmm maybe that moral still is not quite right but i think its getting close

2009-02-19T13:22:00.000-08:00

so, originally i was going to write this post about tmi tuesday. you know a couple days late. fill out all the questions and be done with it. but then i read the questions and they did not seem interesting enough for me. or i lacked creative responses instead of the very weak, and lame typical one word yes or no response. but i feel i should write something. so after that i desided well maybe i can write about the adventures that happend on the weekend. such as driving addy out to liz's house and that whole drama section of my life. but you know what that is addys life and not my place to post it on my blog. i continued to think about my weekend and about what had happend and it occured to me there is other stuff that i can write about. such as skinny dipping. a group of friends and i did that on valnetines day and we have decided that it is going to be our new valentines day tradition. honestly forget buying you loved ones presents just go skinny dipping with them. that is soooo much better and more fun.

then i thought well it is mainly my friends who went skinny dipping with me who read this blog, so there is no point in recalling to them what they participated in. even though it was really funny. and there was the incented of the random peice of seaweed that karen and i found in my towl, after i got dressed. and i offered it to her as a joke. not knowing what part of my body that it came off of. karen loled and then simply placed the peice of seaweed on the buddy christ that is now sitting in my car. i have left it there cause you know it makes for a good conversation starter. picture this your in a car and somone randomly askes why you have a peice of seaweed hanging off of a buddy christ bobble head. rofl, sounds like a good conversation starter to me.

i also thought that i could write in detail about how after that. jenni, fiona and i decided to go to the park and dance in our bras in the middle of the night. jenni took some pictures and i have to say they are very funny and i am going to have to ask her for them soon because they make me laugh. also when we were participating in this very fun underwear dance in the middle of a park at 2 in the morning jenni saw a cop car comming down the road and we quickly ran to our own vehicles and put our cloths on in fear of being stoped. or questioned. luckaly the police pulled over for a speeder who was going the other way. thank god for reakless drivers. :P.

then i thought that i could write about today. rant about the one preschool kid who does not like me becasue i made her share toys with other kids instead of hogging all of the toys to herself. oh how evil am i to make a kid share *note sarcasim*. infact today when she asked for help from laura the other teacher was like well laura is right behind you honey. this kid looked at me frowned then looked back and was like "no, i want the real laura". which is the name of the other teacher. the girl who runs the preschool.

but then as i was comming up with all these ideas on what to say and what to type. in the corner of my eye is saw that stupid little clown toy that my dad has. that for some stupid reason my dad likes to keep here. and i turn it around and my dad turnes it the other way around. clowns creep me out and i hate this one, and it is staring at me. and i want to distroy it but that would make my dad un happy cause its his kid toy. and to make things worse my brother put it in a tiny box. so now it is a little evil clown. poking out of a box. ITS STARING AT ME. and my dad is taunting me with it to get me off of the computer saying that im taking to long.

clowns are evil they should die.

2009-02-10T16:54:00.000-08:00

okay so im going to do another tmi tuesday before i do that...AHHHH I ONLY GOT A B ON MY BIRTH PROJECT FOR WOMENS ANTHRO....it was dissapointing. i know that a b is good. but for once that paper felt like an A paper. DANG DANG DANG. *sigh*. that sucked. okay now on to tmi tuesday:

1. What do you think is the un-sexiest part of the body?
depends. if you asking males i would have to say penis. yes it is useful and nessicary for all the fun stuff but in all honesty penis's are ugly, and are not a turn on. i dont know about girls....maybe when they have really really huge boobs that are obviously fake

2. Toilet paper: over, under, or what the hell are you talking about?
i would say over. because other wise if it is under you usually end up with scrapes on your hands when you go into public washrooms cause your trying to reach past the spikyies to tair the toilet paper. then you end up with battle wounds on your hands. and i think the only battle wounds that one should have as a resulte of the bathroom should be a result of some passionate fun with a partner in some nice expensive hotel....prefurable one with a big bathtub :P

3. Have you ever called in sick to stay in bed with a sexual partner?
nope not yet becaues my "partner" and i are not sexualy active yet. and considering i start work at 5:30 in the morning. and i still live with my parents i dont belive that would go over to well...maybe ill try once i move out.

4. Did your parents have a "birds & bees" talk with you? Id so, at what age?
no my parents did not give me the birds and the bees talk. the funny thing is that my older brother did. well we were watching south park. then after that my parents made me tell them exsactly what he told me to make sure he did not teach me wrong. i dont know how old i was..i think i was 10...possible younger.

5. What is one thing a someone could do to you to rock your world?
-visit me randomly when im sick or emo, or make me something
i dont realy know actually. people always tend to surprise me with things and whatever the surprise is usualy rocks my world...i cannot pick a certain thing...i like creativity.

although that being said anything involving taking me to a lake or anywere to swim usually will work....hmmm water sex? lol jk

2009-02-06T17:34:00.000-08:00

just a cool quote that i found by kevin smith.

My Father taught me how to be a man – and not by instilling in me a sense of machismo or an agenda of dominance. He taught me that a real man doesn’t take, he gives; he doesn’t use force, he uses logic; doesn’t play the role of trouble-maker, but rather, trouble-shooter; and most importantly, a real man is defined by what’s in his heart, not his pants.

2009-02-02T12:50:00.000-08:00

so i had an epic adventure today. life is just grand

first was one of the worlds greatiest archetects and i help build and amazing tower and a house for a princess and her wonderful horse. then the princess and i desided to build a bridge and moat, of course me the loyal servant will do anything for a princess. then after that i took a journey to another land. in this land i was not a nobal archetect but instead i was an evil beast. this evil beast which i was had come to destroy the land and everything within it. but luckaly there was this one nobal man with a poisionus finger. he did not use his poisenus finger for bad though, only good. and he slayed me the most evil of all beast. i had quite a dramatic death. in which all the people of the village stoped and looked at the evil beast dying and then they cheered on the heroic boy.

after that i traveled even farther when i came to a land full of wizards. were we got in epic douls and most of the other wizards were better then me. i got turned into a number of things such as a frog and then eventually a bannana. after that i got to go on a quest for a young night to find his dimond which he had acedently lost behind the oven of the castles kitchen. then some very nice hair dresses about five i wil say, all decisded to give me a brand new hair do for free, oh there was snipping and brushing and lots of other wonderful things. after that magic journey it was time to go adventure to the land of outside. where there were many games that constantly went on such as tag. and i even saw one young man turn into a turtle and go down a slide. it was amazing. after that it was time to venture back to the castle where there was a great feast happening full of fruits and veggiis and pizza and cookies. (nom nom nom). well there were also stories being told and songs being sung.

after this i unfrotinitly was done my volunteer shift and toad preschool and had to snap back to reality. man i find little kids amazing they are so much fun although they did take some energy out of me. i cant wait to go back and volunteer on wednesday.

umm yes so thats my epic adventure.

oh and by the way because i could not swear today when i was with little kids : fuck, ass, shit, hell, cock, cunt, dam, bitch, ...pussy, clit,

okay i feels better :D

womens antrho homework

2009-01-28T22:00:00.000-08:00

so here is the paper that i had to write up for my womens anthropology class. i had fiona edit it. she did not edit the ending though because of the fact that i had not writen that much when i sent it to her...so the ending probs sucks but the rest is realy good. umm ya for this paper i basically had to write about my birth, so just a warning thats what is writen here. alos this is really long..just a heads up. anyway enjoy :

Comparing my birth with many others North American births, mine was a complicated and risky business. This was because both of my parents carried genetic deficiencies that put the women and the baby at high risk of not surviving the labour process. In my father, the genetic issue was that the thirteenth chromosome had an extra hook. This defect makes it highly unlikely for fetus survival. My mother’s genetic defect was developed over time because she had a miscarriage in her past. The doctors told her that she would have a good chance of having Placentia previa in her future if she were to have children again. Of the circumstances that my mother went through because of the miscarriage, she needed to have Amniocenteses. This was to test a baby’s chromosomes to make sure that they were both healthy and surviving.

Unlike my birth, my older brother was born under normal circumstances of a North American culture. He went through the smooth procedure of delivery without a trace of alarm. On the other hand, my birth was an event of panic and fear of survival.

It started off the way most births would start off in a North American culture. When my mother started getting contractions, my dad instantly decided that she needed to be driven to the hospital. In the summer of 1989, however, there was a nurse’s strike and the hospital was short staffed and low on beds. When my parents first showed up at the hospital, the nurses had my mom walk around for a bit to wait to see how serious it was. After what the nurses considered a throughout assessment of my mother’s condition, they concluded that she was not ready to give birth and told her to go home. At the time of my brother’s birth in 1987, there was no nurse’s strike and my mother was let in right away. Unfortunately, in my case my mother was just told to hang around and walk around because of the lack of staff then eventually told to go home. On the way home after being told to leave, my mother and my father started to notice that she was bleeding a lot. So my father turned around and drove back to the hospital. When they got back to the hospital the nurses became aware of how much my mother was bleeding and started to worry. As a result of the crucial condition that my mother was in (by the time that she was ready to give birth to me) there was a lot of technology used. There was a lot less technology used in my brother’s birth.

For my brothers birth there was a heart rate monitor for the mother and for the baby, as well as other monitors to keep watch of the mother and the Childs vital signs. As well, my mother asked to take an epidural to take away the pain of childbirth. As for my birth, because of the fact that it was more complicated, there was a lot more technology. This technology was mainly needed because of the fact that I was a c-section baby. The technology that was used during this process was an ultrasound, and an aesthetic to make my mother unconscious during the c-section. As well because my mother was losing a lot of blood she needed to have a blood transfusion. After I was born I was placed in an incubator and fed through a feeding tube; I had been born seven weeks premature. My parents note that if it had not been for all of this technology, they do not believe that I or my mother would be alive today.

With my brothers birth there was no c-section for he came out quickly and painlessly. With my birth a c-section was needed. This was because, like the doctors had speculated earlier, my mother was suffering from Placentia previa. The placenta was tearing away from the uterus and my life support as a fetus had been failing. This was the reason my mother started to lose a lot of blood. Because of this my mother was unable to make any decisions. During my birth the doctor actually came out to my dad and gave him three options to choose from. The first one was that they continue to try natural labour and that there was a very low chance that either my mother or I would survive. The second option was that the doctors try to enduce labour. With that option the doctors said that only I would survive. The third option was a c-section. The doctor told my father that both my mother and I had a fifty percent survival rate. My father tells me that he saw that he only had one option, and that was the c-section.

In both my older brother’s birth, and mine my father had the option to attend and watch. My father attended my brother’s birth but, he did not attend mine. The doctor did give him the option to be present at my birth but because of the seriousness of the situation, my father did not feel it would do any good for him to be in there. He said that he felt if he were to go into the delivery room with everything that was going on he would just get in the way. Although my father does say he regrets that decision and that he wanted to be in the room. He said that he felt that the doctor had pressured him into not going into the room. The doctor was the one that made him feel like he would be in the way, and that him being there would not do any good.

Well in North American culture my brother’s birth can be seen as normal. The use of technology was normal. Things such as epidermal are seen as quite normal in today’s standards of birth. This is because mothers do not wish to feel the pain, and unlike in some other cultures it is not considered a loss in experience, or at lest it was not considered a loss in the experience for my mother. Through out my brother birth both my parents made the decisions as a couple. The decisions were not just left up to one person. Because my parents felt as a couple they could make decisions together and without it being a stressful situation such as my birth they had the time to do so. Also during my brother’s birth my father was allowed to attend. And did attend. There was no pressure felt from the doctors or from anyone else making him feel that he should not attend or that he had to attend. Well my birth I don’t believe can be seen as normal, for this culture. There was extra use of technology. This technology was needed at the time so that my mother and I could survive, but it was more what doctors would normally use. During the birthing process it was mainly left up to my father to make the major decisions. This could be considered unusual as most mothers are making the decisions during their own birthing process, or a couple makes them together but given the situation it was left up to my father. Also the last thing that makes my birthing process different was the fact that my father was unable to witness the birth. Not because he was no allowed to, but because he felt pressured by the doctors not too due to my mothers situation. In comparison my mother’s whole birthing experience with my brother can be seen as the more normal experience for most mothers in North American culture. Well the majority of the experiences that my mothers when through during the birthing experience with me are not viewed as quite so normal.

2009-01-22T14:58:00.000-08:00

so im taking womens anthropology. and right now we are learning about birth, cross culturaly. which i am finding interesting. it is making me realize how depended on technology we are in this culture. oh my god it even starts when we are born. in the book we are reading there was even and interview with a nurse and she herself said that working in the delivery ward is like working on an assembly line. its all about go go go. get the women preped. get the baby out. make sure they are both healthy and then move onto the next one.

but that is not really what has me thinking. even though i could go on about how we are stuck on technology for hours. the ironic thing is that this is comming from the girl who has a cell phone, ipod, laptop and a car....so maybe i should not talk.

the thing that did strike me in class today was the fact that the author of the book that we are reading said that the whole studying of birth gig is best left up to women. she basically says that women will do a better and more efficent job. and if thats not enough the part that annoyed me was that even girls who dont want kids...or never plan on having kids. would do a better job studying the birth process then a man who is intrested in, or wants kids. i might be wrong but this sounds alot like sexism. okay i will agree that women my have a better advantage studying the whole birth and pregnancy process then men do.

they have this advantage becasue women will actually be allowed into the birthing hut in some cultures and areas around the world. well men are forbidden just because it is the culture, or becasue for a pregnant women who is giving birth is just really uncomfortable with the idea of a strange guy being there. well she may be less uncomfortable with a strage girl being there. do in that way i can see why girls would have an advantage. but i still do not belive that it should be said that guys would do a bad job.

for one. lets take north america, look at how many of the doctors here actually are men. in this culture where we are tought that it is not gender that gets you were you wanna be but it is intrest, hard work and education. so that means that women had the opertunity to be doctors and yet there are alot more men then there are women. so...men must be interested in the birthing process. and men must wanna study it, some men,. and men must be educated in how the body works and what to do. if this were not the case i dont know about you but i would seriously be questioning this countries doctors. even my doctor specializes in pregnant women. and my doctor is a guy. so you know what..i think this shows that yes guys can be interested and yes they can do an excellent job studying the birthing process if they were interested and deticated to what it was that they are studying.

One more point from me and then i will stop the rambling of this topic. there are so many different aspects one can take when studying the birthing process. yes, there is the actual birth but that is just a small part of it. there is also the whole other nine months. thoes nine months that the women is growing, and changing. the husband or partner is as well. he may not being going through all the physical changes that the women is but things are chaning. some fathers say that it even though they have been married for a while it is not untill their wife is pregnant that they start to realize that it is not all about them anymore, they are going to have a family that they feel that they have to protect and look after. a male may not be able to go into the birth hut, but well that is happening he could talk with the men. get the mens perspective. see how the men are growing and changing well the women is growing. couple grow together, or at least that is what i am always told. and what appears to happen.

so why is it then that we only have case studies on the women during the birth process? what is going on with the husbands and the other men in the family. i know a women carrying a baby for nine months, that whole process of another human being created out of what seems like nothing is facinating. what she goes through, and what she deals with.

but when has anyone done reserch on the guys? how they are changing? what they are going through? and how they deal with it?

how do these two people grow toghether

TMI

2009-01-20T18:22:00.000-08:00

1. Have you ever dated/married purely for money?
nope, and i never plan on doing that. i belive love lasts longer then money

2. What is your type?
i dont know if i have a type. i like the ruged look.

3. What is the best sex game you have ever played?
i have never played a sex game

4. Have you ever given or received an orgasm from a person whose last name you did not know? no. i have never recived and orgasm from a person :P

5. Have you ever masturbated in front of a sexual partner?
no. and i dont really plan on doing so. whats the fun of playing one player in a two person game

2009-01-17T17:22:00.000-08:00

so i was reading a book today forget what its called some random book that i picked up at work. and there was this one line that literaly made me lol. i think some of the customers thought that i was on crack cause i was randomly laughing...they could not see the book.

anyway the line was along the lines of

"if you ever want to make your boyfriend happy just blow up a car with a rocket launcher"

of course in the book the main girl who was talking was trying to take out a mob boss. and also she did miss and ended up hitting her own car. which the guy found histaricaly. knowing my luck if i ever had to take somone out with a rocket launcher i would end up hitting my own car :P.

but yes i found that quote funny.

umm i wonder were one can buy rocket launchers...incase matt ever gets emo and needs some cheering up.

also whose car would i destroy. lets all hope for our cars sake that matt never gets that emo.

becasue im thinking me + rocket launcher = alot of cars going up in flames.

so i will end with this

save a car make sure matthew is happy!!

i

2009-01-16T15:02:00.001-08:00

tmi tuesday questions..only a couple days late

1. On a scale of 1-10, how satisfied are you with your sex life?
well im not actually having sex yet, but im in no rush to get into that. so i would say that it is good. i am satisfied.

2. If someone shoves you up against a wall while kissing you, your reaction is?
it sounds very hot, and delightful. hopefuly if it ever happens its as sexy as it sounds

3. What is the most romantic thing anyone has ever done or said to you?
ummm, i cant think of anything really that romantic that anyone has done or said to me.

4. Where is the most unusual place you have ever had sex?
never had sex,

5. How do you liked to be kissed?
is it just me or does this sound like a stupid question....who does not like to be kissed.? i love to be kissed. but i am a chicken shit and am horrible at making the first move.

2009-01-14T20:58:00.000-08:00

so im starting to wonder how i can be getting stressed out when it feels like im doing almost nothing this school year? is that possible? obviously. so this school year as i said i am only taking two courses. two. my first project is due on tuesday but that is now what im stressed out about. im getting stressed over everything else. lets see. my plan for this summer is to go and travel through scotland with fiona. this plan makes me uber happy becasue i have wanted to go to scotland since i was 15. i even have a giant poster of scotland in my bedroom. and fiona got me a giant scotland flag that hangs out in my bed room. so ya that gives you an idea of how into scotland i am.

so the whole stress thing. yes i am stessing over so much stuff that i have to get done that is not related to school at all. i need to get my passport done soon. so that i can travel. i need to get the pictures taken (where im not allowed to smille or they will think im a terrorist, yes cause i have the guts to blow stuff up and kil people) then i need to send the stuff in soon so i can get it back intime to go.. or if i have the time drive downtown and wait in an uber long line. i need to get a background check so that i can get into the ecce program. early childhood care and education. becuase you know they dont want rapists and such working with little kids. i also need that background check for volunteering which starts in febuary. once again same reason dont want weirdos volunteering with little kids. i need to finish filling out the forms so i acctualy can get accepted into the program. i know i will get in im already in camosun. and they already have all the proof of my good grades and all that jazz.

but i need to get it in and hopefully be accepted before febuarary cause i need to prove to the preschool that im going to be volunteering for the course. not casue im a creeper who likes to watch little kids. so yes all this fourms and sighning up for crap is stressing me out. but im planning on talking to the police tommorow about getting a background check. and i will hopefully have the forms filled out and be signed up for the ecce by monday.

on a happier off topic note i made cookies today with matt. that was fun. i kinda screwed up a bit by putting things in the wrong bowls but then matt helped me fix it and the cookies turned out great...although im sure quite a bit of the cookies got eaten before they even made it in the oven. but then they turned out great. we also watched supernatural.

and this note if a.d.d cause even though im talking about cookies im thinking about that camosun form that is siting on the table a bit down from me that i should probably fill out. WHY DO I PROCRASTINATE. i will get everything done. i will relax.

*sigh*. i suck at bloging.....

im to distracted. hey look cider. maybe i should drink that :P

yumm peach

2009-01-11T20:09:00.000-08:00

wow i have not posted in a long time. i would like to be able to say that my reason for that is becasue i have been really busy. busy with school, busy with work, and just all around busy with life. and although that is true to some degree i think in reality i am just blogger lazy. and also forgetful. so what did i do today. what is going on in my life. well life. life is fun. i am currently only taking two courses at school. thats becasue im trying to switch my programs. instead of being a elementry school teacher i desided to be a preschool teacher. this is because i want to work with younger kids. i love kids. maybe because im so much like them. i love jumping in big puddles when it rains. and the idea of finger painting makes me happy. im such a little kid it its not even funny.

so the days that i go to school are tusday and thrusday. starting in febuary mondays and wednesdays are going to be used for volunteering at a preschool. and right now im working friday and saturday mornings. 5:30-2 GROSS. ya i know early equals mass suckage but atl east i get off early and still get to go out saturdays. oh and the place i work, relay airport gift shop. wooot. i sell cheap crap at expensive prices. and i know that cause i hear customers complain about it alot. even though what we mainly sell is drinks and chips and gum. so yes thats a tad of my fill in. most of my friends now whats going on with me so i dont feel the need to fill in anymore.

so today. i drove downtown with shannon. we meet up with brynn and we went shoping. i would say all in all it was a succesful shoping day. i bought a leather jacket which i have wanted for a while.

okay let me refraise that.

i bought a pleather jacket. not real leather but hey im trying to save up money to travel. (to scotland, and ireland in the summer with fiona hopefully we will make it to spain after to participate in the yearly giant tomato fight but scotland is our main goal) so i dont really feel like spending 100 dollers or over on a jacket. i ended up spending 45. i also got a shirt from utopia i love that store. if i had more money i would buy all of my clothes from there.

brynn, shannon and i also raided the bay center, a record store, and curiouse commics. shannon bought me a graphic novel that looks really interesting. and she bought some posters for her room.

so ya there is more that i could write about for today but im starting to feel like im rambeling maybe thats becasue i have not blogged in a while, or maybe its because i actually am starting to ramble which i have a habbit of doing even when i dont blog. so anyway im going to end this blog. and continue paying attention to the movie that i should be watching with my dad. yay kill bill. i love quinten tarintino movies. i actually bought a pulp fiction poster the other day, quentin tarintino has not made a movie in a while....i hope he comes out with something new soon.

anyway im rambling again, so im ending this post for the second time.

tired, gross, and dieing

2008-07-02T11:46:00.000-07:00

well the tittle basically sums up how i feel right now...except for the dieing part,i guess. for the past four days i have not gotten less then five hours of sleep a night. not only that but the days have been full of so much stuff. ok, so, i guess i should explain this. sort of give you and idea of why im so tired lol.
Saturday:
-wake up-call friends to organize going to beach-hang out at beach for most of the day-come home exahusted, have shower, go out again
- go to sleep over
- stay up till three in morning
- sleep on overheated air matrise with other person

sunday:
-wake up at four..realize this is too early fall back asleep
-wake up at six thirty realize this is still to early..why am i waking up. fall back asleep
- wake up at 8:30 gives up..stays awake. for about a couple hours..then falls asleep when frinds go groccery shoping for caffine and breakfeast
.- leave appartment, go through carwash, watch table flight out of back of truck. jump out throw it back in.
- goes home. calles friend, goes out again
- hangs out with friend for lunch and goes back to appartment with friend for another sleep over
-stays up till 12-sleeps on couch

monday:- wakes up takes friend (at about nine in the mornging home). comes home and sleeps till 5 at night
-trys to go to sleep at ten, because i have to wake up at six on tuesday, but cant. goes on computer till 1 in morning cause i cant fall asleep

.tuesday:
-wake up at six, feels dead
- catch ferry with parents and drive to whistler to visit older brother
- five hours later arive at whistler see brother for 5 minutes go on ziplines with dad (amazingly fun...zipping hundreds of feet over trees and rivers on a cord..i would deffinitly do it again).that took 3 hours
- have lunch with brother start to drive home with parents

basically affter that, on the drive home we got stuck in a crap load on traffic. stuck in vancouver becasue on one bridge there was a accedent, and on the other bridge that could have been used to cross someone decided that tuesday would be a good day to jump off the bridge and kill themslef so that bridge was closed...if you ever going to kill yourself the least you can do is to take your car and drive off a cliff in the middle of no where. that way you not effecting thoes of us who are still here living out lives..and hey there will be one less car on the road..my word that was a long day. we missed our ferry and i ended up staying in my dads hotel room. sharing a bed with him well my mom sleeped on the couch. being a mom she refused to let me sleep on the couch...for some odd reason. then we woke up at six this morning and because my dad is working in vancouver and cannot drive us my mom and i had to bus to the ferry's and then catch them home. at the moment i feel like i just wanna find a bed and not wake up till tommorow.

but i have a feeling that, that would not be a good idea considering that i have to start my first day of work at one today. but i do no for a fact. that when i get home tonight im going to take a shower because i feel uber gross from all that. and then go to sleep.

on the brightside even though we were traped in vancouver we got to see the fireworks. that was fun...oh my gosh im tired

birthday

2008-06-10T18:03:00.001-07:00

well my birthday is getting really close. actually it is tommorow. and i have come to the conclusion that i am just an odd person. i know there are a number of reasons for me saying this :P but i have one main reason for pointing this out now. i am an odd person becasue for the past month i have been counting down the days till my brithday all excited about being nineteen. you know, it seems like an important age. reason to be excited. but now that my birthday is one day away i am no where near as excited. i am actually the oppisit. im kinda like wow i dont really wanna get older i dont wanna grow up. i mean 19 will be a fun age. the time when i can leagaly drink. and go to clubs and all that fun stuff. but it also means more responsibility. i have this bad habbit of sometimes not wanting to acknolage or accept responsibility. i really dont wanna grow up. i wanna saty 18. 18 seems like a decent age sure you cant drink but you can do every thing else. another thing is that 90% of my friends are younger then me. whats the fun of being old enough to drink if you have to wait for your friends.

i have this bad fear of growing up, of getting old. and i know there is this whole thing that people say like no matter how old you get you can still be a kid. and i think i do a decent job of proving that saying. but still honestly i find myself getting scared at the idea of one day being old...being that old lady in a scooter. and i know that is a long way away. but i dont want it to come, i want to stay young. i dont want to get so old that i trun into one of thoes old ladies who cant even function, who gets put in a home just because she is too much hassle to look after even if her family does love her. i dont wanna become that old lady who becomes a hastle for her family.

i know that im overthinking this whole age thing way too much because honestly im only turning 19 im still young. but something struck me the other day. i know my dad was totaly joking but he said "wow your going to be 19 in a couple of days. that means i can legally kick you out of the house". and i was kinda like what..... no.. he was kidding and thats not going to happen.

but on the upside of all this fear i get to go out to bosten pizza and get a vodka slurpie. on thrusday (the day affter my birthday). so that should be fun... maybe just the fact that im excited over a vodka slurpie proves that im not really growing up that much.

i dont want any beer or champaine or anything nice along thoes lines. give me the surgary drink filled with crap and booz. how much do you wanna bet im not even going to like the taste of it ?:P

bored bored bored today, yesterday was better

2008-05-01T17:15:00.000-07:00

so today has been one of the most uneventful days that i have had in a long time. i was supposed to get together with a friend that i have not seen since febuary but that did not work out. and it was sorta to late to make plans to go out and do anything today considering most of my friends are younger then me and have school, or they were already out doing something. which left me to sit at home and twiddle my thumbs. so today mainly consisted of sleeping, eating, walking the dog. watching invader zim and hanging out on the computer. and right now i feel so bored i could die ...

some people find it extreamly relaxing to have a day when you do nothing like this... yes that can be true but most of the time for me. i would rather be doing something with someone. or at least have a friend over to do nothing with me. im getting tempted to go be a loner and catch the bus and raid sidney right now..sidney is small you never now maybe i will run into someone i know that i can hang out with.

yesterday was so much better then today. i was not bored once yesterday...well not that i can recal. but then again yesterday was a wednesday, and wednesday has unofically become Laura and shannon hang out day. so i whent to visit a bunch of my friends at lunch at their school yesterday which was fun. i love going back to the old school it makes me feel so popular, consideing about 80% of my friends are younger then me and still in highschool. when i go there i swear everyone has a tracker in their heads that lets them know exsactly where i am. becasues i always seem to get swarmed by friends. which is great.

then later on, on wednesday i picked shannon up from school. we had to run some errands like go to her work so that she could request days that she needed off of work. then we decided that we would go to sidney and make a video for our friend ben who lives in germany. we have not talked to him in a long time and we decided to do something. speaking of that video i still need to lend my camera to a bunch of bens other friends so that this can end up being a good video not just one from shannon and i.

affter running around sidney acting like idots we drove to our friend chris's house becasue he invited to have us over for dinner. chris is an amazing cook by the way. omgosh chris if your reading this i will come over to your house for dinner any time that was good good goood. he made teriyaki chicken and rice yummy. the night continued with us watching the movie high fidelity, and playing brawl. which chris one most of the time. shannon won twice although in all honesty i am pretty sure chris was going easy on us.

yes so yesterday was a heck of alot of fun...well today was. not so much. oh well tommorow will be better its friday tommorow, and as long as its sunny i know there will be an adventure. i can already tell, or at least im hopeing.

update..sorta

2008-04-24T16:33:00.001-07:00

so, i orginaly thought i would try and update and say what i have been up to since i gave up on blogging, but that has been over a year and i am thinking that would take up way to much time, and not to mention a heack of alot of blog space, but for key facts for anyone who does not know

-i got my N in july (yay) and im going to camosun now. thoes are the main facts if i think of anything else really big i will post it.

so yes so, what have i been up to? well last night i had shannon and werner over to watch my fair lady. i love that movie it has to be one of my all time favorites. you know how some people have comfort food that they eat when they are feeling sad or whatever? well i have a comfort movie and my fair lady is it. i don't know what it is about this movie but it just makes me happy.i was telling shannon this and she had an urge to watch it. That is why we watched it last night. But usually my fair lady has a habit of just comming on tv..when im going through one of thoes days. I will give you and example. ok so this valentines day i was being a stupid emo single person and going through one of thoes really lame emo days that everyone gets (especially on valentines day) and a crap load of my friends seemed to be out with their boyfriends or their girlfriends or working or just to busy to go out and do anything. and my brother was out with friends, and my parents were out for dinner. so i could not even be the lame kid who hung out with her parents or family :P.

so while i was sitting and being all stupid and emo, guess what came on tv, thats right my fair lady. instantly that movie made me feel better. and i was not sad or lonley anymore. i was being the compleate dork that i am and i was singing along to the songs and everything. which is easier to do when your the only one home.

then last month i got this stupid emo feeling again, and gaing my fair lady came on tv. and then once again i was feeling better. i love this movie it has magjic powers i swear.

so yes shannon werner and i watche that movie and it was pretty awsome, for me anyway. shannon and werner said that they liked it as well which was good. i dislike making people watch movies that they dont like just because i like it, i feel bad. i was acutally kind of worried that shannon might find it boring but she really seemed to enjoy it. and actually said that she wants it now. The only thing that sucked about the movie last night was the fact that it keeped fuzzing out on some parts , silly vhs. anyway that is all that i can think of to say right now.

oh peice of advise. if a vhs is going all fuzzy dont try yelling at it and claping your hands, it does not work, you cant scare it into working. even though i did try :D

long time no talk

2008-04-24T12:13:00.000-07:00

so over a year ago i gave up on this blog. mainly for two reasons. one because i belived that i never wrote anything interesting and nothing worth acutally reading, so whats the point in keeping a blog if nothing intersting is being writen right? and two becasue the blog website was being stupid and not letting me sign in. but now affter getting that fixed up i have desided that i am going to give this bloging thing another try. even though i know the majority of the people i know also gave up on blogging a while ago. .

anyway i need to go and catch a bus considering its my brothers day with the vehicle, but i will be sure to up date and fill people in on whats been going on in my life later.

me list re-posted

2007-01-19T14:46:00.000-08:00

so some people wanted to know how many things i had left on my list and in all honety i forgot. of course i could have just looked and poseted up the number but hey any one can do things the easy way.. so here you go my list of things to do before i die. oh and the numbers with stars beside them are the things i have done.. enjoy reading this thing...lol

Things to do before I die
Laura Matthews

1. Graduate
2. Go to Scotland
3. Travel across Canada
*4. See phantom of the opera live
5. Meet all the living members from Led zeppelin
*6. Send a message in a bottle
7. Go to the Paris opera house
8. Give birth
9. Donate blood
10. Go streaking
11. Write a book and get it published
12. Go scuba diving
*13. Eat haggis
*14. See how many marshmallows I can fit in my mouth
15. Read war and piece
16. Be on every continent
17. Join a protest (that I believe in)
18. Write a letter to five famous people and see who responds first
19. Get my portrait done
20. Milk a cow
21. Ride a llama
22. Fall madly in love
23. Drop a penny off the empire state building
24. Send Alyssa a hot Scottish guy
25. Pet a sheep in ten different countries
26. Find out what McDonalds burgers are really made of
27. Swim in a pool filled with ice tea
28. Go in a hot air balloon
29. Start a food fight
30. Kiss in the rain
31. Go hang gliding
32. Moon George bush
*33. Hug a tree
34. Make the work koober popular
*35. Dance in the rain
*36. Make balloon dart paint
37. Make a giant finger painting
38. Make a sea shell necklace
39. Read the bible from cover to cover
40. Wear an avocado face mask and convince 3 other people to do it with me
*41. Go to youth convention
42. Ride in a limo
43. Dress as a clown
44. Create a time capsule with a group of my friends
*45. Yell recola on the top of my lungs off a cliff
46. Pet a dolphin
47. Touch the worlds larges coffee pot
*48. Dress as the phantom for Halloween
49. Adopt a chilled in need
50. Take keyboard lessons
51. Touch a shark
52. Go to a jimmy page concert
53. See green day in concert for the second time
54. Watch the movie Casablanca
55. Have a giant water balloon fight
56. Throw a pie in someone’s face
57. Get my full drivers license
58. Be and audience member in the Ellen degenerous show
59. Be an audience member in the tonight show
60. Attempt to learn Gaelic
*61. Pull an all nighter (watch the sun set and rise)
62. Witness and eclipse
63. Witness a meteor shower
64. Find a job I love
65. Overcome my fear of clowns
66. Buy a Laura Lilly and grow it
67. Create my own family tradition
68. Do the terry fox run
69. Go to bible collage
70. Send someone a dozen red roses
71. Receive a dozen red roses
72. Fly in a helicopter
73. Work with kids.
74. Wear a skirt with my family tartan on it
75. Get married
76. Run through a felid of sun flowers
77. Take lots of pictures
78. Live life to the fullest
79. Create my own flavor of ice cream
80. Write some one and entire letter using only my mouth
*81. Hug Natasha without getting pushed, shoved, poked, punched, jabbed, kicked, hit or any other type of physical violence in return
82. Roll down a soft hill into a lake
*83. Throw a snowball in the summer
*84. Shower under a water fall
85. Buy my own house and spend the time making it what I want
86. Go bungee jumping
87. Touch a pyramid in Egypt
88. Dip my feet in the Nile
89. Jump off of a bridge with a group of my friends just because of the saying if your friends jumped off a bridge would you do it to
90. Give up phantom for a month
91. Swim in every ocean
92. Eat only red food for a day
93. Get a star named after me
94. Burst into dance and song like in the movies
95. Shake hands with someone famous
96. Take a mud bath
97. Make flying cow t-shirts with Shannon
98. Help Shannon burn evil clown painting
99. Go to a 48 may concert with Shannon
100. Try and go a whole day walking backwards
*101. See Shannon dress up a Mario for Halloween
*102. Kick josh
103. At Jennies wedding read the note that I wrote at her house
104. Go skinny dipping
105. Meet some you tube celebrities
*106. Build a fort and spend the night in it
107. Walk through a car wash
108. Be a two or more places at once
109. Ride an elephant
110. Learn to write with my right hand
111. Get my entire body painted
112. Make a beaded curtain out of can opener thingies
113. Be and extra in a film
114. Visit the Webb crystal factory in England
115. Go to the island of Arran in Scotland
116. Make and entire thanksgiving meal all on my own
117. Celebrate Canada day in an other country (again)
118. See great, great uncle Courtney Cox’s grave in Dieppe
119. Offer random people hugs like that guy on you tube
120. go and see rocky horror picture show in theaters with a group of friends.(dressing up is optional)

he he i am crazy

-laura

one year of blogging

2007-01-14T11:06:00.000-08:00

So it has been about a year that I have had this blog for. And I remember that my first post was my list of things that I plan on doing before I die. So I thought for this post I would say all the things on that list that I have done in a year. This should be interesting he he.

#4. See phantom of the opera live: yep I did that. I think I even turned one of my parents into a phan in the processe.

#6. Send a message in a bottle: thank you sarah. Fun trowing that bottle off of the Sidney peir . I wonder if any one ever found it?

#13. Eat haggis: that’s right I did it…Robbie burns day

#14. See how many marshmallows I can fit in my mouth: only 3 because I have heard of people choking that way and I was a chiken.

#33. Hug a tree: good ol parkland court yard

#35. Dance in the rain: thank you kaitlin good times.

#36. Make balloon dart paint: my house that was fun. If you need proof talk to Sarah I believe it is hanging up in her bed room.

#41. Go to youth convention: awesomeness hey Shannon remember listening to brother yusef on the ride back he he.

#45. Yell recola on the top of my lungs off a cliff: me Fiona and Sidney spit what can I say.. We are teenage girls that cannot be held responsible for our actions.

#48. Dress as the phantom for Halloween: of course I did this I mean common did anyone doubt. Thank you to Rachel and Shannon who helped me find parts for my costume.

#61. Pull an all nighter (watch the sun set and rise): girls sleep over that was fun..Shannon remember …oh man wow we are silly.

#81. Hug Natasha without getting pushed, shoved, poked, punched, jabbed, kicked, hit or any other type of physical violence in return: ha ha I did that and I have the picture to prove it

#84. Shower under a water fall: yay camp t-bird

#101. See Shannon dress up a Mario for Halloween: fun fun fun Natasha’s Halloween party

so ya that is all that i did hope i did not bore anyone who spent there time reading this.
have a great day

-laura

Breaking the stereotype

2007-01-04T22:40:00.000-08:00

So I was reading someone else’s bog and they were wondering why teenagers are always perceived as bad? Or trouble makers? I made a long rant about stereotypes and I could have made a longer one but I stopped because I did not want to fill up to much on her bog. So I have sort of made this list to prove (as if it need proof) that those stereotypes are wrong.

Teens are All Having Sex & Getting Pregnant
-umm no that some teen are having sex… (No idea why) but not every one. With all that we have had drilled into us lots of teens are to afraid to even get merely close to doing that because teachers and guardians have been drilling in our minds since grade six that we could die of freaken aids or something.

Teens are all Violent and Dangerous
- Umm I start to wonder were the crap this came from….paranoid people. I am not even going to touch this one. it will take up way to much space

Teens are Disrespectful of Adults
-not true most of us are very respectful to adults. And what I have found well at least with me is that most of the time when we are disrespectful to adults is when the adults are disrespectful to us first. When they talk down to us and treat us like we know nothing and judge us or act like we are up to no good before they even know us. So yes. Moving on

Teens Don't Care About the Future
- Ha ha ha ha ha were the heck did this come from... it is myth that we care about nothing but fun but how many of us teens have a job…are making a difference, volunterring. I know I volunteer all the time. And every one I hang out with especially this year I have heard talking bout the future and what they are planning on doing. If anything we are worrying to much about the future.

Teens are all High
-high on life, god, friendship, family. Nothing else for me thank you very much

Yes well those are some of stereo types. Hope you enjoyed my little rant.
-Laura

yet another song

2007-01-04T17:48:00.000-08:00

so i was wanting to update but i had no idea what i was going to update this blog with so i decided to go look through songs that i like and post some song lyrics again. well i found a song and i planning on posting it but i realized that this song that i am going to post is well rather depressing then a thought came to me... why do we like listening to depressing songs.. is there a part of us that actually likes the feeling of being depressed or emo. or do we listen to them because we when we hear the lyrics there is a part of us that makes us feel like we can relate to what the singer/band is saying. or maybe it is just fun to listen to when you are acctually feeling like how the singer/ band describes.

i donno any way yes that is my only deep thought in this post..if you can even call that thought deep more random then anything. here is the song

Child of the wilderness
Born into emptiness
Learn to be lonely
Learn to find your way in darkness
Who will be there for you
Comfort and care for you
Learn to be lonely
Learn to be your one companion
Never dreamed out in the world
There are arms to hold you
You’ve always known your heart was on its ownS
o laugh in your loneliness
Child of the wilderness
Learn to Be lonely
Learn how to love life that is lived alone
Learn to be lonelyLife can be lived life can be loved alone

ya sorry made anyone feel emo or depressed by thoes lyrics but i am odd and i actually like that song.

well hope that your all having a wonderful day

-laura

eyes again

2006-12-28T11:35:00.000-08:00

so on a previous post i posted a pic of my eyes and i said guess what this person is thinking well some people wanted me to do it again so here is another pic. (let me know if you want me to actually tell you what this person is thinking or if you like just to guess)

weird

2006-12-24T00:48:00.000-08:00

so i was talking to a friend on msn this night. and we were talking and she bluntly commented "you are weird" and i was like ya you just notised . and she responded no its just that i thought i would point it out again. and then i did a big speal on how i am weird and how i am prowd to be. i think it went somethng like this.

I AM LAURA NICHOLE MATTHEWS I AM A PHANTOM LOVING, LED ZEPPELIN LISTENING, SCOTLAND WANNABE WEIRDO, WHO IS IS NOT AFRAID TO BE WEIRD. INFACT I EMBRACE IT WITH OPEN ARMS.

originaly i was just saying that to be funny and be well a smart @$$ but then affter reading it i realized it was true. i am kind of wird and i do not mind being weird the least bit. affter all what is the fun in being normal (then again there is that whole argument of what is normal but that is for another blog post) i love being who i am..that silly little christain girl who is a phantom loving, led zeppelin listeingng, scotland wannabe wirdo. why would i want to change. and affter all who would want me to change. i donno if this blog even has a point..maybe i just wanted to post my rant but whatever i like it.....

and to quote my younger cousin "its weird not to be weird"

-laura

Merry Christmas

2006-12-15T15:35:00.000-08:00

wishing every one a merry christmas and a happy new yer
song: happy christmas
Artist: john lennon

So this is Christmas,
And what have you done
Another year over
A new one's just begun
And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young
Chorus:A very merry Christmas
And a Happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good oneWithout any fear
And so this is Christmas
For weak and for strong
For rich and the poor ones
The world is so wrong
And so happy Christmas
For black and for white
For yellow and red ones
Let's stop all the fight
Chorus (2x)
And, so this is Christmas
And what have we done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And, so happy Christmas
We hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young
Chorus (4x)
Happy Christmas!Happy Christmas!Happy Christmas!

drifters

2006-12-09T15:48:00.000-08:00

so unfortanitly i was unable to go to the movie last night. But i spent the night with my family instead and we celebrated my brothers birthday (3 days early). my grandma come over and we had cake and all that good stuff. then we drove my grandma home.

me and my dad had an intresting conversation on the ride home affter droping the grandma off. there was dead silence in the car. the radio was not on or anything, my dad asked me what i was thinking. i was actually thinking of people that i have only meet once or have not seen since camp or kindergarden. i was and i still sometimes find myself wondering what they are doing now, were they live, and how there life is going. it is kind of funny how many people just seem to drift in and out of our life. it is also sort of cool how we seem to remember thoes people and wonder how much of a difference or impact they might have made in our lives.

there is this one girl i remember from grade 3, unfortanitly i cannot remember her name right now. but i do remember that we used to hang out alot we would go running acrosse the feild, chassing affter our frinds and have them come chassing back after us, but then at the end of that year she moved and i did not really hear from her again.

then there are frinds that i remember vividly that whent down the wrong path, turned to drugs and then moved away and i wonder what they are up to know and if there was anything that i could do or that i could still do to get them out of that direction.

it just seems odd to me to think that at one point you can know a person who is a really close frind of yours, or you can have strong feelings for and then they can leave or somewere down the road you dont realy know or they arnt really your friend anymore.. and do they wonder about you.

ya well thoes are my thoughts for right now. hope every one is having a great day.

-laura

Gary jules lyrics- mad world

2006-12-06T14:41:00.000-08:00

Artist: Gary Jules
LyricsSong: Mad World Lyrics

All around me are familiar facesWorn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races Going nowhere, going nowhere
And their tears are filling up their glasses No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow No tommorow, no tommorow
And I find it kind of funnyI find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying Are the best I've
ever hadI find it hard to tell you'Cos I find it hard to take
When people run in circlesIt's a very, veryMad World
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listenWent to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew meHello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me

emotion by eyes

2006-12-02T10:47:00.000-08:00

what do you think this person is thinking when you look at their eyes...........
i always thought it was interesting to try and guess that sort of stuff. so take a guess what emotion or thoughts are floation on in this persons mind

3 girls+ one camera+ lots of snow = chaos and lots of fun

2006-11-30T15:21:00.000-08:00

snow

2006-11-28T15:10:00.000-08:00

omgosh i love snow. i cannot belive how much we have. i do not remember having snow snow in november since ....well i cannot remember having snow in november.

i do not know about you but snow is another one of thoes things that really brings out the little kid in me. i love making snow men and snow angles and all that fun stuff. oh man yesterday i was such a goof i ran around in the snow like a flippen idot. the only thing that i think would make this winter alot better would be if a lake or something froze over enought so that we could go skating on it.

i do not think that i have ever been skating on a lake. i know i have skated on a feild that flooded and then froze over but i cannot recal a lake. so i would love it if that happend that way i could go and experience something new and fun. .

-laura

ps. sorry that i could not come to your movie night sarah..i really really really wanted to i was tempeted to call in at work and say that i could not go. but i have to go to work. hope its good.

SURPRISE

2006-11-24T15:09:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR SARAH

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU

yayay aayyayayayayyayaya happy birthday sarah
(yes i know this post is a bit late but i hope it still works)

-laura

phantom fan

2006-11-19T17:21:00.000-08:00

Hey. I’m not obsessed with star wars, or Lord of the rings
And I don't root for r/c, or e/m, or e/o.
And I don't really care for charlotta, pangi or meg from the story, although I'm certain they're, really nice.

A cool weapon is a punjabb, not a gun

Erik is supposed to have a French accent, NOT American. and I call 'HIM ERIK', NOT THE PHANTOM

I can proudly play music of the night on the piano. I believe Christine should have been with Erik, NOT Raoul. Inner beauty, NOT apperance, AND THAT THE ORGAN IS A TRULY PROUD AND NOBLE INSTRUMENT

CHRISTINE DOES LOVE ERIK, RAOUL IS A FOP, AND IT IS PRONOUCED ERIK NOT ERIC', ERIK!!!

PHANTOM IS A CLASSIC GASTON LEROUX NOVEL! THE LONGEST RUNING MUSICAL AND THE GREATIST LOVE STORY OF ALL TIME

MY NAME IS LAURA!! AND I AM A PHANTOM FAN!!!!!!!!

mental thoughts of an emotional teenager

2006-11-16T20:41:00.000-08:00

wondering,waiting. no response. worrying, sweating. why why. Maybe my cell phone is not working? can parents cut you off is you send to many messages. Tap tap tap. should i call. I dont want to be pushy. send message to friend. testing, testing 1,2,3 is this working. oh why do i feel like this. ring phone ring. maybe i should go for a walk, thats it get fresh air. when i come back there might be a message for me..... grab dog leash put on shoes, head out door. wait! some things missing. dog inside me outside, go back in grab dog put leash on her and go for walk. come back. fresh air did not help. dry dog.

run up to room. cell phone new message. Heart stops could it be....opens phone. No, friend replied yes it works. close phone gahhhaaaefagoueersa. ok deep breath now. might be busy, thats it busy...more worry, worry worry WORRY WORRY!. ah wahts come over me. butterflys in tummy.. Boys are stupid they have cooties. go to bathroom. no no no screams. new pimple why?. back to bed room. erg homework. shuts off phone. Annoyed.. fine be that way.

Tries to do homework but does not work. Replaying in mind last time we talked..could i have done something different.. should i ahve said something different. grades sliping. Parents lecturing. turns phone back on, check messages nothing....close, check again. nothing and one more time. nothing. throws cell phone in baskit of laundry.
why wont you call me?

creativity in boredom

2006-11-16T18:31:00.000-08:00

so on tuesday i was compleatly bored out of my mind. so i decided i was going to do what i think almost any normal bored teenager would do. i signed on to msn. and i started talking to people.. one of thoes people was matt schmidt (sorry if you last name is spellt wrong. i will edit it if it is). and he was telling me how late some of his home work was because he was a big procrastinator. and i was like wow i thought i procrastinated alot but you are worse then me you should get some kind of award. and anyway the conversation continued on that topic and then i decided to make matt a "biggist procastinator award" which was hand drawn. so i did that. i drew a pretty cool award,i think. and i coloured it and i put it in an envolpe which i coloured red because hey all the cool awards are in red envelops.

i also filled up the envelpe with spakeling things. matt seemed to enjoy it and as far as i know he still has the "award" in his binder and has been taking it to his classes.. he he at least now he has the proffe that he is a procrastinator so that he can give all his teachers a fare warning.

well that is about all i have to talk about right now hope you all are well.

oh and a little up date on me..i got a job a tim hortons so yay. i finaly get to start earning money and not just getting it handed to me any more ( that is if you dont count baby sitting)

quote:a great pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do- walter bagehot

-laura

message

2006-11-12T23:51:00.000-08:00

watch this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q24TNmfN01o

thought..school..?

2006-11-08T16:40:00.000-08:00

yay more random thoughts but this involves reader participation.. so if you can give me you thoughs

some people say that school is a good thing becasue it allows us to make friends, have many experiences and learn some things that we would not be able to learn or know otherwise. well others are on the side that argues that the world is a sad place if people are "fourced" to go to school just so that they will be able to support themselfs and live a normal life. what is your opinion on this statement.

there are deffinantly alot of experiences that we have had at school and the truth is that the hole time that we spent in school with our frinds and such has really shaped who we are.. so here is another question

were do you think you would be or what do you think you would be doing now if there was not school.. ? (if there was no such thing as school)

-laura

random

2006-11-06T19:04:00.000-08:00

this is a random post just to show a friend how blogger works because she does not understand...

:)

-laura

The coat hanger

2006-11-05T11:30:00.000-08:00

so i got sent this story in an e-mail and i liked it so i thought i would post it here..enjoy

A woman was at work when she received a phone call that her small daughter was very sick with a fever. She left her work and stopped by the pharmacy to get some medication. She got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys in the car.
She didn't know what to do, so she called home and told the baby sitter what had happened. The baby sitter told her that the fever was getting worse. She said, "You might find a coat hanger and use that to open the door." The woman looked around and found an old rusty coat hanger that had been left on the ground, possibly by someone else who at some time had locked their keys in their car. She looked at the hanger and said, "I don't know how to use this."
She bowed her head and asked God to send her help. Within five minutes a beat up old motorcycle pulled up, with a dirty, greasy, bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag on his head. The woman thought, "This is what you sent to help me?" But, she was desperate, so she was also very thankful.
The man got off his cycle and asked if he could help. She said, "Yes, my daughter is very sick. I stopped to get her some medication and I locked my keys in my car. I must get home to her. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?" He said, "Sure."
He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was opened. She hugged the man and through her tears she said,"Thank You So Much! You are a very nice man.
" The man replied, "Lady, I am not a nice man. I just got out of prison today. I was in prison for car theft and have only been out for about an hour." The woman hugged the man again and with sobbing tears cried out loud, "Oh, Thank you God! You even sent me a Professional!"

.........?

2006-11-02T19:41:00.000-08:00

random title i know but i think this is mainly going to be a rant with a bit of confusion so i was unsure what to put for a title. so today for comparative civilizations we went on a feid trip which was lots of fun and we learnd some cool things. but i do not think it was thoes things that really stuck with me on the trip. on the bus ride back to the ferry i saw people listeng to their ipod's, girls playing hand games, friends talking, and other people sleeping and other people just being goofs singing to the johnny cash music that was blaring out the speakers.
and i think it is memories like that, that will still stick with me when i am older. ..liz wrote a blog earlyer asking why is it that we seem to remember the bad stuff more then the bad (sorry if i interprated that blog wrong) well i am one of thoes people who loves to people watch.. i love to see how others interact and intace thoes memories . memories of friends laughing on the bus,..being goofs singing to johnny cash, going and getting slurpies. or just sitting in a hot tub and having a good conversation. (hot tubs are excellent for that buy the way..have a friend who has a hot tub and you want to have a good conversation raid their house and do it)

wow i just lost my train of thought.......ummm like i commented on liz's blog lots of times we remember the bad stuff because it is more shoking to us..and it has been scientificly proven that, that stuff is just easier to remember. and sometimes all we can do is intake the good memories and drown out the bad... i am sure if every one who is reading this were to try right now to come up with ten good memories and then try to come up with ten bad memories it will be easier to come up with the bad memories.

when i am old and possible i have grandchildren i hope i can be one of thoes people who has cool stories to tell them. about the me and sarah went through the car wash, or the time i feel down a clif.. wow this blog is random.. i was thinking about this more in detail on the bus i wish that i had writien it down..but i did not have a pen. .... oh well maybe more of it will come back to me later and i can write more....

dont you find that anoying when their is something you want to say and you lose your train of thougt and forget what you wanna say. i need to start carrying a pen and note pad with me so that, that does not happen any more. any way hope you all have a great day or night
-laura

question

2006-10-30T18:56:00.000-08:00

so werner was over infact he still is..(wow off topic already that has got to be a new record for me) and anyway he says that i should up date my blog. i do not really no what to say so i am going to ask a random question in hopes that people will respond and answere.

was music a human discovery or invention?

cliff

2006-10-26T16:20:00.000-07:00

story time every one this one is the story of the day that i feel down a clif. it was painfull and my fault too, but hey it makes a good story.

ok it happend this month last year. my friend natasha was staying with me because her mom and her step dad were off on their honey moon. it was a sort of rany affternoon and my mom told me and natasha to go and walk the dog. so we put on her leash and headed off. i was telling her tthat their was a beach acesess around my neibourhood. but there is a clif that we would have to climb down to get to it. (can you see were this is going). but there used to be a rope and i thought it was still there and i thought that we could climb down .....with the dog...well wearing shoes with no grip...on a rainy day...well i forgot my cell phone at home (can you say dumb idea!!). any way natasha thought that we could give it a try.

so we walked down to the beach acess. and natasha looked down the clif and she was the smart one who told me that maybe if we are going to climb down the clif we should tie the dog to a tree and see if we can make it without her before we try well taking her down. (i have a small sketched out dog so we would of had to carry down because she would be to affraid to climb down by her self). just to give u guys an idea of the cliff that i fell down. you know when you go on the bc ferrys heading to vancouver and you look to your left as it is pulling out and you can see that big sign that says cable....ya that was the cliff that i fell down. anyway the rope was no longer there so natasha decided to go down first. she got down easy did not trip or stumple or slid at all. seeing her do this i thought well that looks easy i can do this.

so i started to climb down. i was sliding down the dirt a little bit, and then when i was about half way down a lost my grip and i started to fall. oh and to make things worse i was more on my stomach then anything and i could not see were i was going. and there was a board with a nail sticking out of it on the bottem. luckaly natasha was fast she managed to slow me down and prevent me from landing on the board with the nail in it. oh sounds like the story is over but nope its not. once i wiped off my hands and made sure i was ok. me and natasha realized two things one it was impossible to go back up the way we came and two the tide was comming in. we ended up walking along the beach untill we saw an easier way up but this way was coverd with bushes. we ended up bush wacking our way up but first we had to take off out shoes because they had no grip at all and we were passing them up to each other well we climbed. we finaly go up and got back to the dog and walked home.

we were both wet, tired and pretty dirty. and i learned something from that experience. never leave without a cell phone, were shoes that you can climb in, and just becasue your friend can do something that looks easy does not mean that you can. ok hope you enjoyed this
-laura

love

2006-10-22T13:18:00.000-07:00

love...we all have experienced it in some form or another, well all would agree that love is a good thing.. but i was thinking what is love, what does love mean. that word seems to be thrown around too much and these days. its signifigance is starting to wear down and the true meaning of what love is seems to be forgoten.
i looked it up and according to the dictionary love is :

1 a (1) : strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties
(2) : attraction based on sexual desire : affection and tenderness felt by lovers
(3) : affection based on admiration, benevolence, or common interests b : an assurance of love 2 : warm attachment, enthusiasm, or devotion 3 a : the object of attachment, devotion, or admiration b (1) : a beloved person : DARLING -- often used as a term of endearment (2) British -- used as an informal term of address
(4) a : unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another: as (1) : the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2) : brotherly concern for others b : a person's adoration of God
(5) : a god or personification of love

so my question is what does love mean to you?

re post street cone

2006-10-20T23:32:00.000-07:00

so umm i took this off because i was dumb and thought that i was introuble...jezz i really need to learn how to take a joke, silly me. no andrew you cannot have my street cone go and find your own. anyway here is the story once again.

it happend this month i think around the 14 or something, around the middle of the month. any way first off the reason why there were street cones there was becasue there had been a car accednet and a car took out some of the overpass. so untill there was a replace ment part there for the overpass the north saanich guys had put a bunch of street cones down to warn people. every day when i would walk home i would see the street cone and i would find my self having the hurge to take it, i wanted that street cone. so one day well walking home i decided i was going to do that. i picked it up as i walked passed it but then half way across the bridge i chickend out and was unable to do it.

for the next couple of weeks my mom drove me to and from school so i had no chance to try and take it. but then soon i was walking home again. on the weeks that i was getting rides i notised that my cone was gone i thought some one else must have taken it (luckaly there were two.). so as i was saying i was walking home again and i saw the one street cone that had not been taken so i decided today is the day i am going to take that street cone and i am not going to chicken out. so i walked to it and out of the corner of my eye i saw the orginal stree cone that i was going to tak thrown in the bushes by the overpass. so i ran and got it.

feeling proud of myself for having my original street cone i walked across the overpass with pride. but then well i was almost done crossing the overpass the north saanich guys were driving underneath me and they saw me caryying the cone. so i boked it up the road. it was quite a work out considering i had most of my books in my back back (stupid heavy biology text book). i did not stop running untill i was convinced that they were not following me. but the path up to my house is by a hight way so every one who was driving bye could see me (this 17 year old girl with a street cone in her hands).

i decided to cut through this smaller but longer path that goes through the woods to my house so that i would not be seen. that was long. finaly i got home and now the street cone is siting in my bed room. which makes me happy. i told my mom this whole story and she thought it was funny. she was just happy that i am not tall enought to steal a street sign or anything of greater value (which i do not think i would do.. street sighn maybe).

so ya i am sorry about being lame and deleting this..it is back up. so does any body have any original ideas about what i shoud do with the street cone. i know that i am going to get everyone to sighn it for grad but then i am not sure if i should keep it, or put it back were i found it or even if i should make a times capsule with it..if anyone has any cool ideas let me know.

-laura

imiturity act # 2 and 3

2006-10-19T20:16:00.000-07:00

you know that your imiture when you plan you turn your inside car wash joke into a dance...
step one: BUBBLES
steptwo: WATERFALL
step three: HURRICANE

you also no your imiture when you plan on ginving a friend a piggy back and when you try and knock her off because she screamed in your ear coughtshannoncough you both end up falling into the mud.

step by step guid on how to make a pumpkin man

2006-10-13T16:16:00.000-07:00

so fall has come and as the days go by it is getting closer and closer to halloween, and with halloween i have a tradition. every year i make a pumpkin man. i told a friend about this (sara) and she had never heard about making a pumpkin man before. so i made one today with shannon . so here for all of you to enjoy here is the step by stpep guid to making a pumpkin man:

step one: get all the stuff that you need. such as a t-shirt,old pants and other things

Step two: rake up the leaves that will be used to stuff the clothes

Step three: cram leaves in the wheel barrow

Step four: stuff the leaves in the clothes(he he my pumpkin man went to camp thunderbird)

Step five: collect chess nuts. these are placed in bucket head so that the wind will not blow it away

step six: set the pumpkin man up on a chair

then you are done if you want you can give him some company or do whatever to make your yard look even more halloweeny. . anyway it was lots of fun making this guy. hope you enjoyed this blog

-laura

free hugs

2006-09-28T19:35:00.000-07:00

i saw this video on you tube and thought it was cool. i wish i had the courage to do this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4